2022-1-8 a Message For Niilit

[0:00 - 0:25] Oh, everyone. I'm making this message for Nyla Thredpanda. First off, Nyla, I want to say what's up. You know that I know you personally. But first off, before I get into anything, I want to say thank you to Nyla Thredpanda.
[0:25 - 0:48] I'm proud of you, man. No matter what you're doing, bro, I'm super proud of you. I do still watch your Twitch, and honestly, man, I'm proud of where you're going, dude. I'm proud of what you've accomplished over such a short amount of time, dude. I'm very proud of you.
[0:48 - 1:13] But I am very proud of you. Sorry about that. But I am very proud of what you've done over these last several months, dude. And second off, what? Yeah.
[1:13 - 1:42] But there's something that you need to know now. Friday night, this was Friday, I was almost shot and killed while doing a livestream. I was standing right here in this very spot.
[1:42 - 1:59] When a bullet came through my window, it struck my mattress. And I didn't know it till the next day. When it happened, I had no idea. Until a good friend of mine showed me on Facebook what really happened.
[1:59 - 2:20] And I rewatched the footage, and I found a bullet hole in my window sill and my mattress. We called the police and everything, and, you know, went from there. But after seeing what happened, dude, it made me realize a lot of things.
[2:20 - 2:38] It made me realize that I can't take life for granted. And it made me want to rekindle a lot of friendships that I've lost over the years because of a lot of this trolling stuff, including with you, man.
[2:38 - 2:55] Because, you know, no matter what, no matter what you might think of me now, I have always saw you as family. I have always saw you as my brother, and I always will.
[2:55 - 3:07] I have always saw you as my brother, and I always will see you as my brother, man, because you've always tried to help me no matter what.
[3:07 - 3:24] And I hope that you understand that all this trolling stuff I've been through over the last five years has not been my fault.
[3:24 - 3:35] And yes, I know I made a lot of mistakes. I get that. I do.
[3:35 - 3:51] But I hope you understand that every single bad thing I did was out of just pure reaction and pure self-defense of myself and my family.
[3:51 - 3:57] Because you have to understand something I like.
[3:57 - 4:04] Six years ago, I was myself. I was able to do things without being attacked.
[4:04 - 4:17] And then somehow, rather Marty somehow drug me into being trolling. And for the last five years, I've been bullied, not because I wanted to.
[4:17 - 4:28] I never asked to be bullied. I never asked to be made out to be a pedophile.
[4:28 - 4:35] I never asked for any of this. And for the last five years, I've been trying and trying to escape.
[4:35 - 4:52] Like I have been trying my best to escape. But as I said, even if I walk away from the Internet, these people will do stuff to me in real life as well to my family.
[4:52 - 4:59] As you already know, they sent a dead baby pig still in the mother's fetal sac to my house.
[4:59 - 5:11] They have swatted me several times over to where police have had guns drawn on me.
[5:11 - 5:27] And then like last night when things went from being on YouTube to real life on Friday night when they tried to kill me.
[5:27 - 5:35] And I hope you know that I've been trying my best to get out of this. I've been trying my best to escape this.
[5:35 - 5:43] But it's hard to do when real life gets brought into it.
[5:43 - 5:54] It's very hard to escape something when your real life gets brought into it.
[5:54 - 6:03] And second, I want to say thank you for doing what you did for me on Twitch before these evil assholes got me banned.
[6:03 - 6:10] You have no idea how grateful I am for you doing what you did to help me out.
[6:10 - 6:17] I was very happy that you did what you did for me. And I will forever be grateful to you for that.
[6:17 - 6:27] The fact that you took time to help me with my Twitch before these assholes got me banned for no reason means the world to me.
[6:27 - 6:36] It really does. Any amount of help that you've done to help me, I appreciate. I really do.
[6:36 - 6:48] And as I said now, I know that you might not want to hear from me. And I understand why because of the label, the thing that I've been labeled as.
[6:48 - 6:55] And I understand that I do. But I also hope you know that I still will support you.
[6:55 - 7:05] And then I have always and always will see you as family.
[7:05 - 7:13] Because from the day I met you, man, you've been one of the coolest fucking people I've ever known.
[7:13 - 7:23] You really have been. You were one of the very few that's been there for me when I was going through some very tough shit.
[7:23 - 7:29] When I lost my older brother, you were there.
[7:29 - 7:37] When I went through all these relationships, you were there.
[7:37 - 7:42] You know, you've been there for me through a lot of shit now.
[7:42 - 7:49] And I want you to know that I appreciate every single thing that you've tried to do for me.
[7:49 - 7:56] And I hope you know that I have been trying for the last five years to get my life back.
[7:56 - 8:02] I don't understand myself how I got brought into this trolling community.
[8:02 - 8:17] But for the last five years, going on six years at the end of this year, I have been fighting and fighting and fighting to get out as much as I can.
[8:17 - 8:36] Even going to the police, I would try to get out. That's how far I've gone. But the police here will not do anything to help me because they have mislabeled me as a 43, which means mentally disturbed, when clearly I'm not.
[8:36 - 8:44] And I hope you understand that I have been made a target, not by my own choice.
[8:44 - 8:49] And I have been doing everything I can to try to escape that.
[8:49 - 9:01] There's been many a times where I've tried to walk away, many times I've tried to walk away, and it just makes it worse.
[9:01 - 9:16] But I'm hoping that when you see this, that you'll reach out to because honestly, dude, ever since Friday night, it's made me realize a lot of shit.
[9:16 - 9:35] The first thing that it made me realize is that that could have been me laying there. Had I been laying there, I would not be here right now talking to you.
[9:35 - 9:45] And it also made me realize that I cannot take life for granted.
[9:45 - 9:55] And one thing I've learned now, amongst all this shit, is that life is too fucking short to stay mad at someone.
[9:55 - 10:06] Life is too goddamn short to not keep your friends around.
[10:06 - 10:14] Like I said now, you've always been a good friend to me. You've been there when no one else was.
[10:14 - 10:20] And as I said, I want your Twitch all the time, bro. I love your content.
[10:20 - 10:26] I was here when you first started it, and I'm fucking proud of you. I'm proud of what you accomplished.
[10:26 - 10:34] I'm proud of everything that you're doing with your life. I mean, you've got a wonderful, beautiful family.
[10:34 - 10:43] You've got great people. You have an amazing fan base.
[10:43 - 10:50] And I'm proud of you, man. You've accomplished so much in your life.
[10:50 - 11:07] And when you took time out to help me out with my Twitch to get me going, I was happy, dude.
[11:07 - 11:13] And I know you don't know why my Twitch got banned, so let me explain it to you.
[11:13 - 11:21] These trolls, they went and made it look like I was doing something that I was not doing, and they got me banned.
[11:21 - 11:26] They made it look like I was doing shit that I wasn't doing.
[11:26 - 11:41] And Twitch banned me from that. They banned me from doing shit that I wasn't doing at all whatsoever.
[11:41 - 11:53] Yes, Lou, I would like you to�and matter of fact, Lou, you read my mind, bro. I was actually going to ask you to do that.
[11:53 - 12:02] But now, let me tell you, man, a lot of shit's gone on since we stopped talking.
[12:02 - 12:10] A lot of bad shit has gone on since we stopped talking.
[12:10 - 12:24] My mom ended up in the hospital due to a miniature stroke.
[12:24 - 12:46] I'm close to ending up in the hospital because I don't know if you know this or not, but I've got a whole bunch of rashes all over my body that are stress-induced to where I'm going to have to go into the hospital on Friday and find out what the fuck I can do to heal my body.
[12:46 - 12:51] And like I said, I almost got shot and killed Friday night.
[12:51 - 13:06] And let me tell you now, they say that life flashes before your eyes when you realize you almost died, and mine did.
[13:06 - 13:21] Knowing that I could have died, it really sank in when I realized I was almost killed.
[13:21 - 13:28] It made me realize, dude, that life is too goddamn short to stay mad at your friends.
[13:28 - 13:47] Now, like I said, I don't hate you. I don't. If anything, I've always, and I've said this to your face, I've said this to you multiple times, man, you have always been like your brother to me, and you always will no matter what.
[13:47 - 13:57] No matter whether you speak to me again or not, I will always support you, and I will always see you as family.
[13:57 - 14:08] And as I said, dude, I don't know why I got drug into this trolling community or why I got made a target, dude.
[14:08 - 14:17] I don't know why I got made a target, but let me tell you something, dude. I have been fighting like hell to get out of this.
[14:17 - 14:31] You can ask Lou. You can ask anybody that we are mutual friends with. I have been fighting like hell to get out of this situation, and it's not as easy as it looks.
[14:31 - 14:47] It's not as simple as ignoring a bully. And I wish to God it was. I wish it was that simple.
[14:47 - 15:08] Now, like I said, now, these people, they not only attack me on the Internet. These people attack me in real life.
[15:08 - 15:21] These people attack my everyday life. And, you know, I'll be honest with you, man. You're one of the reasons why I wanted to get my life back on track from the very start.
[15:21 - 15:32] You're one of the reasons, you're one of the people that inspired me to get my life back on track and do what I need to do to become successful.
[15:32 - 15:47] You have no idea how much I look up to what you do, man. You have no idea how much I look up to what you do.
[15:47 - 15:53] Because your success and what you do, like I said, I'm proud of you for that.
[15:53 - 16:10] And seeing you do that makes me want to be on that level of success and get away from all this and have a fun fan base where I can do my thing and have fun.
[16:10 - 16:19] You have no idea how much you helped me now and how much you actually pushed me to want to be myself again.
[16:19 - 16:28] Like I said, we may not speak at all because of everything that went down, but let me tell you, I still show love for you.
[16:28 - 16:39] I still show support for you. And you've always been family to me, always.
[16:39 - 16:51] You've always been like a brother to me because, like I said, when all this shit started going down to me, you had my back.
[16:51 - 17:05] And I do appreciate you trying to fucking help me. I really do.
[17:05 - 17:11] And I hope that you can see, Nyla, that I'm not what these people have tried to make me out to be.
[17:11 - 17:25] I hope you can see that all this peddle shit that they claim, this and that and the other, I hope that you can see past all that and know that I'm not what they make me out to be.
[17:25 - 17:34] Because, Nyla, you've talked to me in real life. You know how I am in real life.
[17:34 - 17:48] We've hung out many, many times through Facebook, through FaceTime, all that shit, man.
[17:48 - 18:06] So you, as well as anyone else, knows how I am.
[18:06 - 18:23] So now I hope that, like I said, I hope that you can understand that all the bad shit that I've said and done, all of that was out of pure self-defense of myself and my family.
[18:23 - 18:32] Because you've got to understand something, dude. I've never been in that situation. I've never been bullied that much in my life.
[18:32 - 18:48] It's kind of like poking them there, dude. You poke them there and poke them there and poke them there, or you provoke someone so much that at some point they are going to fucking snap and say and do shit that's not like them at all.
[18:48 - 19:12] And that for me, that for me, is what happened. All this shit these people put me through, everything these people did, all this being provoked, all this being bullied, all this being targeted, over a span of five to going on six years now.
[19:12 - 19:25] These people have pushed me to where I have said and done shit that I'm not proud of, but all that shit that I've said and done that I'm not proud of was done purely out of self-defense of myself and my family.
[19:25 - 19:41] Because like I said, I've never dealt with anything like that. I've never dealt with bullying on that level, where these people have done what they've done to me, like making me out to be a pedophile.
[19:41 - 20:01] Having police show up to my house where I almost got shot by police, and then as I said, on Friday night when I almost got shot and killed, now I understand why you disconnected from me, I get that.
[20:01 - 20:12] And I don't blame you, dude. But I also hope you know that none of this was ever my fault, and it was never my intention to push you away at all, bro.
[20:12 - 20:21] I hope you know that it was never my intention to push our friendship away. I never wanted that.
[20:21 - 20:29] If anything, now more than ever, I need people like you in my corner.
[20:29 - 20:41] I need people like you and Lou and Matt and my childhood best friends, Marcus and Rachel, who are literally my brother and sister, because I grew up with them.
[20:41 - 20:51] They are literally family. I've known them since I was 10. They are literally like family to me.
[20:51 - 21:02] Those are the kinds of people that I need in my corner. I need people like you and those people that I've mentioned in my corner that will fucking push me to do the best that I can do, man.
[21:02 - 21:13] Seeing you do what you do, Nyla, pushes me to want to do better. It really does. Seeing what you do, man, really pushes me to want to do the best that I can do.
[21:13 - 21:27] And that's all I've ever wanted to do, was do exactly what you do and to be the best person that I can fucking be.
[21:27 - 21:35] Seeing what you do, Nyla, has made me want to do so much better.
[21:35 - 21:44] And everything that you have said to me, Nyla, has resonated with me over the years and has pushed me to try to do better.
[21:44 - 21:57] No, like I said, I wish it was easy getting out of all this. I wish it was easy to get away from the trolling. I really do.
[21:57 - 22:06] Because, Nyla, you don't know how bad I want away from this shit, dude. You have no idea.
[22:06 - 22:19] Like I said, I was doing good on Twitch, man. I was doing very good on Twitch. And it's because of you that I was doing good.
[22:19 - 22:30] It's because of you that I was doing good, man. If it wasn't for you, I wouldn't have had the courage or the drive to do what I was doing, bro.
[22:30 - 22:39] It's because of you, Nyla, that I was doing so well. I was doing so well on Twitch, and you're the reason why, man.
[22:39 - 22:50] Because you stepped up and you helped me out. And that little bit of help that you gave me pushed me to want to do what I was doing, and I was doing so well.
[22:50 - 23:14] And you're the reason why, Nyla.
[23:14 - 23:20] So, Nyla, I hope that you see this, and I hope that we can get our friendship back, dude.
[23:20 - 23:33] And I hope that you understand that I need as many people in my corner as I can get right now, especially someone like you who has a good head on their shoulders.
[23:33 - 23:44] And like I said, I know where you're at in life right now, Nyla. And like I said, dude, I am proud of you for everything that you've done, man.
[23:44 - 23:55] Look at you, man. Look at you, dude. You made your dream a fucking reality, bro. You made your dream real.
[23:55 - 24:07] You have a beautiful family. You made your dream a reality, man. You got a fan base that loves you. You have people that care, and you are beyond successful.
[24:07 - 24:20] And I'm proud of you for that, dude. I am beyond proud of you for that. And seeing you do that is where I want to be so bad.
[24:20 - 24:32] Where you're at right now is where I want to be so goddamn bad, dude. You have no idea.
[24:32 - 24:39] You know, Nyla, you're one of the reasons why I've kept going all this time.
[24:39 - 24:51] Seeing what you do has pushed me to not stop. You're one of the biggest reasons why I have that never-quit attitude.
[24:51 - 24:59] You're one of the biggest reasons why I have that never-stay-die-and-I-never-quit attitude.
[24:59 - 25:17] Because you showed me that no matter what, I can do what I want to fucking do. That's why I have that never-stay-die attitude.
[25:17 - 25:31] And like I said, Nyla, I'm sorry that these people came after you. I know that it's not my fault, dude, but I still want you to know that I'm sorry that these people attacked you and your family.
[25:31 - 25:44] I don't understand why they do what they do. I don't.
[25:44 - 25:55] I don't understand why these people attack people that are close friends of mine that are family to me. I don't understand why they do it. I don't.
[25:55 - 26:09] Because there's been many times where I've told them, "Dude, if you're going to say something to me or do something to me, leave my friends and family out of it. Don't ever go after them."
[26:09 - 26:17] Do you know how many of my friends have been made a target because of these people?
[26:17 - 26:32] Do you know how many people have targeted personal friends of mine in real life because they've tried to stand out for me? It's honestly sickening.
[26:32 - 26:38] And thank you, Drew Sifer. I appreciate that.
[26:38 - 26:49] And mushroom Hill, yes, they did try to kill me on Friday night.
[26:49 - 27:02] But like I said now, and I hope you see this, and I hope that in some way that we can rekindle our friendship, dude. Because like I said, I was almost killed Friday night.
[27:02 - 27:16] And I found out the day after what had happened, that made me realize a lot of fucking shit. The first thing it made me realize is that I was almost killed.
[27:16 - 27:27] And the second thing that made me realize that I cannot take life for granted and that life is too goddamn short to stay mad at people.
[27:27 - 27:50] Life is too short to not care about your friends. Life is too short to stay mad at people that you care about.
[27:50 - 27:57] So now I hope that you see this and I hope that you understand that I never asked for any of this.
[27:57 - 28:13] And the past five years have been spent me trying to get out of all this and not wanting to be a part of it, not wanting to be trolled, not wanting to be bullied.
[28:13 - 28:23] Because like I said, I want to be on that level where you're at, dude. I want to have that fan base where I'm not trolled or attacked.
[28:23 - 28:33] I want to have that fan base where I can do what I love and not be attacked. I want to be able to do that stuff.
[28:33 - 28:42] I want to be able to do what you do and have fun because you inspire me to do that shit, man. You really do.
[28:42 - 28:46] And yeah, I know I said a lot of things to you and I'm sorry.
[28:46 - 28:57] But as I've told you before, man, all of that stuff was coming from a place of hurt because when you did what you did, to me it felt like that was a stab in the back.
[28:57 - 29:03] To me, it felt like my best friend had just stabbed me in the back.
[29:03 - 29:18] And that hurt. But like I said, I still forgive you. I still see you as family, dude. Despite all that, dude, despite all that shit, dude, you're still family to me.
[29:18 - 29:24] You're still a brother to me and you always will be, no matter fucking what.
[29:31 - 29:36] You will always and always will be family to me, dude.
[29:36 - 29:41] Because that's something I need to realize now. Family fights, dude.
[29:41 - 29:47] Any normal family fights all the time, bro.
[29:47 - 29:57] Family members fight all the fucking time, whether you have a brother, a sister. Family fights, dude.
[29:57 - 30:02] That's just inhuman nature. That's family. That's what you do. You fucking fight.
[30:02 - 30:07] You get mad at each other and then you make up and then you go from there.
[30:07 - 30:14] And like I said, whatever I did to hurt you to make you not want to talk to me, I'm sorry.
[30:14 - 30:20] And if it wasn't something I did and if it was something to do with these trolls, I'm sorry that they did this to you.
[30:20 - 30:26] I'm sorry they attacked your family. I'm sorry they attacked your personal life.
[30:26 - 30:33] And I hope you know that I never wanted that for you and that I tried to stop them.
[30:33 - 30:38] I really did. I tried to stop them.
[30:38 - 30:42] But you know how these people are. They won't listen.
[30:42 - 30:46] All they want is chaos.
[30:46 - 30:51] All they want is hurt. All they want to do is see me suffer.
[30:51 - 30:56] And that's not what I want for myself, dude. I want to do better.
[30:56 - 31:01] I want to get my life back to where it was five years ago like I showed you.
[31:01 - 31:08] Like all those old videos I mean that I showed you a few years ago where I was doing reaction channels and I was having fun.
[31:08 - 31:16] I was vlogging with my brother Jake. I was having fun. I was actually smiling and having a good time.
[31:17 - 31:24] I was having fun back then, dude.
[31:24 - 31:36] And then when Marty attacked me, that's when my life started to go downhill.
[31:36 - 31:46] And Don, I do appreciate your concern, but trust me, I've done slept like four or five hours already.
[31:46 - 31:52] Matter of fact, after I got done with that livestream earlier, I did nothing but lay down and sleep.
[31:52 - 32:00] Literally, I only got up one time to eat and that was it. Other than that, I've been laying down sleeping the whole time.
[32:00 - 32:20] And thank you, Wolverine and L.A. I appreciate what I appreciate that, man.
[32:20 - 32:26] I appreciate your love, dude, for real. I definitely appreciate that, dude.
[32:26 - 32:44] Like I said now, I know that you want nothing but the best for me and I want nothing but the best for me. I really do.
[32:44 - 32:57] And like I said, seeing what you do, man, pushes me and inspires me to do the best that I can do.
[32:57 - 33:15] And I know that you tried to reach out and to help me and stuff. And like I said, I appreciate that, man.
[33:15 - 33:26] Drew, I appreciate that, man. A hundred percent, dude. And Drew, if you have Discord or Facebook, you're more than welcome to hit me up.
[33:26 - 33:40] You are more than welcome to hit me up on Discord, on Facebook, or whatever, man. You're more than welcome to.
[33:40 - 33:50] But now, and as I said now, I hope that you see this and I hope you understand that I never asked for any of this.
[33:50 - 33:57] And I hope you know that I've actually been trying to get out of all this for the last five years.
[33:57 - 34:06] Yeah, it may not have been the best of ways to try to get out of it. But as I said, dude, I've never dealt with bullying or trolling on this level.
[34:06 - 34:13] I've never been in this kind of a situation, so I don't know how to handle it. You know what I mean?
[34:13 - 34:27] It's very hard to deal with when you don't know what's really going on. You've never heard the term trolling, so you don't really know what's up.
[34:27 - 34:41] That's where I'm coming from, dude. So I said five, six years ago, I didn't know what a troll was. I didn't know what trolling or cyberbullying was. I didn't know what that was.
[34:41 - 34:49] So let me tell you, I sure found out real fast over the course of the last five years what a troll is, what a cyberbullying is.
[34:49 - 35:00] I learned real fast what that stuff is. And seeing what these people have done to me, Nyla, I would never wish on my worst enemy.
[35:00 - 35:11] I really wouldn't. I would never wish this on my worst enemy at all.
[35:11 - 35:16] Hey, Morp, how you doing? Welcome to the stream.
[35:16 - 35:23] And like I said, Nyla, I understand why you did what you did, and I don't blame you.
[35:23 - 35:38] But I do hope that you see this, and I hope that you reach out, and I hope that you understand that I've been fighting like hell for the last five years to get my life back.
[35:38 - 35:45] It's not easy.
[35:45 - 35:56] It's not easy trying to get away from everything when they attack your friends, when they attack your family, and most importantly, when they attack your real life like they've done mine so many times.
[35:56 - 36:10] I've lost a lot of opportunities. I've gotten kicked off the labels, fired from jobs, had family members lose jobs, have friends lose jobs.
[36:10 - 36:15] It's not easy.
[36:15 - 36:23] And that's why I've been fighting like hell to get out of all this so I can get my life back.
[36:23 - 36:32] Especially on Friday, dude, since everything went down Friday night, dude, it's not been easy.
[36:32 - 36:40] Over 200 people saw me almost get shot and killed on Friday night around 10 o'clock p.m.
[36:40 - 36:51] And let me tell you, Nyla, that moment was the scariest moment of my fucking life when I realized what had happened.
[36:51 - 37:00] Like I said, I didn't know what happened until my friend Dustin hit me up on Facebook and told me to rewatch the footage.
[37:00 - 37:09] And when I did, and I looked in my bed and I saw what happened, that's when it clicked.
[37:09 - 37:17] That's when I knew what had happened when I had watched back the footage and pulled my bed out to see the two bullet holes.
[37:17 - 37:32] And let me tell you, dude, when I saw that shit, dude, there are no words to describe the sinking, sickening feeling that I felt in the pit of my stomach.
[37:32 - 37:40] There are no words to describe what was going through my head when I felt.
[37:40 - 37:50] And yes, we did call the police, but as you may already know, I could have already guessed the cops won't do anything.
[37:50 - 37:56] Why? I don't know, but I wish to God they fucking would.
[37:56 - 38:03] I wish to God they would.
[38:03 - 38:14] But as you know, because they've labeled me as a 43, they won't do anything, which is not fair and it's not right.
[38:14 - 38:27] Matter of fact, dude, that next day when I found out what happened, I had people that don't even like me messaging me, asking me if I'm OK.
[38:27 - 38:34] I was getting calls on and off all day long that next day of people asking me, hey, are you OK?
[38:34 - 38:38] Are you fine? What's going on? Are you OK?
[38:38 - 38:44] And if you guys don't know what a 43 means.
[38:44 - 39:03] If you don't know what a 43 is in police terms, it means I'm mentally disturbed when I'm not mentally disturbed at all.
[39:03 - 39:25] When clearly I'm not mentally disturbed, clearly I am being targeted.
[39:25 - 39:40] Like I said now, I hope you see this and I know that I'm a little bit repetitive and I'm sorry.
[39:40 - 39:45] But I do hope that you reach out to me then.
[39:45 - 39:49] I do hope that you see this and that you do reach out to me at some time.
[39:49 - 40:00] It doesn't have to be right away, but I do hope at some point when you get the chance that you reach out to me and we can talk and we can be friends again.
[40:00 - 40:11] And hopefully through you and everybody else helping them pull together, hopefully we can put a stop to these people and get these people arrested that have been doing this.
[40:11 - 40:24] I found out what these people are doing is very illegal and hopefully between me and you and everybody else that actually supports me.
[40:24 - 40:37] Hopefully we can do something about this and not only get the people that have been harassing me stop, but hopefully we can together, we can find a person that actually fired the bullet.
[40:37 - 40:43] I already know who ordered the kill on me, which is music biz Marty.
[40:43 - 40:53] Me and a few of my friends did a lot of research last night and we come to find out that it was Marty the whole time.
[40:53 - 40:55] We know why he did what he did.
[40:55 - 41:05] We know why he's doing it to make it look like I'm crazy because he wants it to be a setup so that I get locked away in a mental asylum.
[41:05 - 41:12] That's his ultimate goal, dude, is to have me locked away in a mental asylum.
[41:12 - 41:22] Like he wants to make me look like I'm crazy by any means necessary because I won't do what he wants.
[41:22 - 41:33] So he's trying to do all he can to make me look crazy to where the police won't do anything and that I'll get locked away in a mental asylum.
[41:33 - 41:39] That's what he wants, but I'm not going to give that to him.
[41:39 - 41:47] I'm not going to give him that satisfaction.
[41:47 - 42:00] And like I said, Nick, like I told you, I need people like you in my corner, especially right now.
[42:00 - 42:14] When I'm trying so hard to get out of all of this shit.
[42:14 - 42:26] Because I said now that you know how I am, you know, you see me when I'm calm, you see me when I'm collected, you see me when I'm normal.
[42:26 - 42:37] And that me that you've been wanting me to give back to, that's the me I've been wanting to be this whole time, dude.
[42:37 - 42:47] The chance that you met that day that wasn't being bullied that had a normal life, that's the me that I've always wanted to get back to.
[42:47 - 43:10] So fucking bad. But it's hard to do when every aspect of my life is being attacked by a bunch of bullies on the Internet. It's very hard to do.
[43:10 - 43:20] And I hope that you know now that like I said, you've always been like a brother to me and you always will be like a brother to me.
[43:20 - 43:29] Despite whether we talk or not, I will always show love and support for you. I will always support anything that you do.
[43:29 - 43:36] Any endeavors that you go for, I will always, always support.
[43:36 - 43:46] Like that night when you came out and told me that you were a part of the furry community, I showed nothing but love to you, man.
[43:46 - 43:59] Because like I said, I have friends that are in that community.
[43:59 - 44:22] You're still a friar. I'm doing good, man. Thank you. And what up, anti-boy? How you doing, bud?
[44:22 - 44:32] Well, like I said, you know, you have always been family to me and you always will be.
[44:32 - 44:42] Despite whether you decide to respond to this or not, I want you to know that I will always love and support you, man.
[44:42 - 44:51] And I am proud of everything that you've accomplished with your life. I am so fucking proud of you.
[44:51 - 44:57] And I want you to know that no matter what, whether you speak to me or not, I will always show love and support to you, man.
[44:57 - 45:06] I still watch your live streams on Twitch, even though I don't type in the chat. I still watch your live streams every time you put them up.
[45:06 - 45:16] And I fucking love them. You've got good content, dude. You've done very well for yourself and I am very proud of you for that, man.
[45:17 - 45:29] But I hope you see this, Nyla, and I hope that, you know, you do reach out at some point.
[45:29 - 45:40] Like I said, whether it's within the next few days, whether it's, you know, a month from now, I do hope that at some point you reach out.
[45:40 - 45:48] And now we can take our friendship back up where it left off.
[45:48 - 45:58] Now, I said, I know that you've done nothing but try to help me.
[45:58 - 46:07] I know that you've done nothing but try to help me with this. And I have tried every bit to take your advice.
[46:07 - 46:22] But as I said, it's kind of hard to do what you said to do when every aspect of your life is being attacked and you're not able to do anything.
[46:22 - 46:31] Like, I'm not able to go outside like I used to. I'm not able to do things that I used to love to do.
[46:31 - 46:38] And that kills me. That I can't do things that I used to love, man. I can't go outside. I can't do photography.
[46:38 - 46:46] I can't shoot films like I used to do. I can't do vlogs like I used to do.
[46:46 - 46:52] All because of the hell that these people have put me through. And that's not fair to me. That's not fair to my family.
[46:52 - 46:56] And it sure as hell ain't fair to the people that want to see me succeed.
[46:56 - 47:01] It's not fair to people like you that want to see me do good.
[47:01 - 47:11] So, Nyla, I hope that you see this, man. And I hope that you reach out sometime soon, man.
[47:11 - 47:23] What that man said, dude. What that man said, Nyla, I want you to know, man, that I love you and that I hope that you're doing good.
[47:23 - 47:31] And I want you to know that I am fucking proud of you. I'm happy for you and your family.
[47:31 - 47:44] You know, you got two wonderful kids and I'm so proud of you for that, dude. I am so proud of you for being a dad and achieving your dreams that you wanted to make a reality, man.
[47:44 - 47:58] And I'm proud of you for that, man. Think about that for a minute, dude. You made your dreams a reality, man. You made your dreams happen.
[47:58 - 48:09] You made your dreams fucking real, dude.
[48:09 - 48:20] And not many can say that. Not many can say they've made their dreams a reality.
[48:20 - 48:30] And I am beyond proud of you for that. But like I said, I hope that you see this and I hope that you respond back.
[48:30 - 48:45] Anyways, I will catch you later and I want you to know that I love you, bro. And I hope to hear back from you soon. And I want you to know that I'm proud of you, man.
[48:45 - 48:53] I'm very proud of you. And I will catch you later, bud. Peace.
[48:54 - 48:55] Thank you.