Original upload date: September 10th, 2021 (automatically grabbed from title)
[0:02 - 0:16] What's up guys, um, I just want to say something that is giving me up
[0:20 - 0:29] Am I living YouTube for good at this point?
[0:30 - 0:40] But I do know that due to recent events
[0:42 - 0:44] with people digging in the mountains
[0:46 - 0:50] Attacking my family
[0:51 - 0:53] Attacking my friends
[0:58 - 1:00] Really just doing fucked up shit
[1:01 - 1:04] You know, I need a break away
[1:05 - 1:14] No, it's something you're gonna say. Oh, you know
[1:15 - 1:19] Don't leave oh, oh, oh, I kind of need to
[1:21 - 1:23] because in order
[1:23 - 1:28] In the worst six years of doing YouTube, I have not had one single break. I
[1:29 - 1:38] Have not taken time for myself and I need that break away. I
[1:39 - 1:41] Really do like I need the time away
[1:42 - 1:52] But it has for you trolls that have been
[1:53 - 1:58] Attacking me and doing all this stuff. I know what your deal is. I know what you're after
[1:59 - 2:02] You want to make a name off of me?
[2:03 - 2:05] Because without me
[2:07 - 2:16] You have nothing it's like every time I try to take a break you guys
[2:17 - 2:25] Do something they come in and start shit. I'm tired of it
[2:25 - 2:30] I am sick and tired of
[2:33 - 2:38] People coming in
[2:38 - 2:40] ruining my life
[2:44 - 2:46] ruining shit that I try to do
[2:47 - 2:56] because for the last six years I have tried to
[2:57 - 3:00] Do something good with my life
[3:01 - 3:04] Despite my psychotic ex candle
[3:08 - 3:15] Despite everything that she's put me through. I have tried and tried and tried to make
[3:16 - 3:18] Things
[3:18 - 3:20] I'm better for myself
[3:20 - 3:25] I'm trying to do good things, but it's like
[3:26 - 3:33] Every time I do so many comes along and fucks it up for me and for what reason
[3:34 - 3:48] But I am honestly sick and tired of
[3:50 - 4:02] Seeing this garbage go on and I know in my earlier stream where I have finally
[4:02 - 4:06] flipped out on everyone
[4:06 - 4:13] That it didn't sound like I was in tears, but I actually was I was very hurt and very upset
[4:18 - 4:20] because I am so tired of
[4:21 - 4:24] Not being able to do things that I want to do with my life
[4:25 - 4:28] like
[4:28 - 4:32] It seems like every time I take one step forward
[4:33 - 4:35] And I start doing good for myself
[4:36 - 4:38] And I start making progress
[4:38 - 4:44] With my artwork my music or anything
[4:45 - 4:49] it seems like somebody always feels like they ought to
[4:50 - 4:53] come along and
[4:53 - 5:12] Fuck everything up, and I don't understand why but like I said
[5:13 - 5:15] and like I said earlier in
[5:15 - 5:19] The last stream where I finally
[5:20 - 5:22] Had a meltdown
[5:22 - 5:27] It's true when I said
[5:27 - 5:29] That I have cried so much
[5:30 - 5:33] Over the last six years from all this shit
[5:34 - 5:37] But I literally
[5:38 - 5:51] Have no tears left and that's not a joke. I do
[5:53 - 5:57] Genuinely mean that I have no tears left in my body
[5:58 - 6:01] My body does not pursue produce
[6:02 - 6:04] tears anymore
[6:04 - 6:06] Because I have cried so much
[6:09 - 6:12] Over the last six years from all this hellish stuff
[6:12 - 6:20] I got put through and I'm sorry to sounds like my voice is raspy and
[6:22 - 6:34] But we all know what that's from it's from the meltdown earlier to be quite honest. I am tired
[6:36 - 6:37] physically
[6:37 - 6:41] You know physically I'm worn out
[6:42 - 7:02] I'm mentally and emotionally drained. I'm honestly tired of it and absolutely
[7:03 - 7:15] Sick of it because like I told you guys in that very same stream if you have a problem with me take it up with me
[7:16 - 7:21] We'll sit down. We'll talk about it in private or on a live stream or whatever
[7:23 - 7:25] But guys I'm telling you
[7:26 - 7:29] This shit you guys are doing to me is gotta stop
[7:30 - 7:35] Because what you're doing to me will end up killing me and I don't want that
[7:36 - 7:42] You guys are putting so much stress on me
[7:44 - 7:50] then I literally and
[7:54 - 7:56] mentally and
[7:58 - 8:02] physically
[8:02 - 8:03] just
[8:03 - 8:06] losing everything and
[8:06 - 8:08] I don't want that
[8:08 - 8:17] Which is why I'm taking time off of myself
[8:22 - 8:26] because
[8:26 - 8:28] physically I
[8:28 - 8:30] Look okay
[8:30 - 8:34] But emotionally and mentally I'm not okay at all
[8:34 - 8:43] I'm really not and it's due to all the stress of
[8:46 - 8:48] me being called something that
[8:48 - 9:11] People call me a pedophile, but they don't really know the real story. They don't know
[9:11 - 9:16] the whole
[9:16 - 9:17] situation
[9:17 - 9:21] They only see the after effects and what
[9:22 - 9:27] Massal reports posted and that's very true
[9:27 - 9:30] You guys that talk all this crap
[9:31 - 9:35] You were not there. You only saw the after effects
[9:36 - 9:37] of
[9:37 - 9:38] What went down?
[9:38 - 9:45] You only saw what?
[9:46 - 9:49] She what Massal reports posted?
[9:51 - 9:54] You were not there that day
[9:57 - 10:06] When all that went down you have not had to suffer
[10:08 - 10:10] for six years
[10:13 - 10:15] being torn apart
[10:15 - 10:17] ridiculed
[10:17 - 10:27] By a psychotic ex that has committed crimes and does generally have a warrant out for her arrest in many states
[10:28 - 10:35] to be honest, I am
[10:36 - 10:37] physically
[10:37 - 10:48] Emotionally and mentally drained from all this. I I can't do it anymore
[10:49 - 11:03] Do this anymore this stress
[11:06 - 11:22] The meltdowns I don't need this and just I can't do it anymore
[11:26 - 11:28] mentally and emotionally
[11:30 - 11:32] I'm spent and
[11:33 - 11:36] Physically, I am very very tired
[11:36 - 11:41] from all of this and I'm tired of it
[11:41 - 11:51] I don't deserve what I've been put through for the last six years
[11:51 - 12:09] I really don't deserve it been through so much that
[12:09 - 12:25] None of you can even begin to comprehend. I truly do
[12:29 - 12:31] because I am so tired of
[12:33 - 12:38] Everything that I've been put through the being called the pedophile
[12:42 - 12:47] losing friends
[12:47 - 12:49] Losing my job that I enjoyed
[12:51 - 12:53] losing almost everything
[12:54 - 13:06] That means something to me. It's not right
[13:07 - 13:13] I'm for you guys to do this shit and it's not fair to me or
[13:13 - 13:15] My friends and family
[13:16 - 13:24] So all you chose doing this need to stop, please
[13:28 - 13:36] Stop calling me a pedophile because I'm not one. I got
[13:36 - 13:48] Captished in one of the worst ways possible and it wasn't right
[13:48 - 13:55] But I do know that I'm trying to get my life back where I want it to be
[13:56 - 14:08] Like I said, am I going to leave YouTube?
[14:08 - 14:20] I honestly don't know at this point. I just don't know I would like to stay I
[14:22 - 14:24] really would I would love to stay and
[14:27 - 14:29] Make things happen, but
[14:29 - 14:31] at this point
[14:31 - 14:35] with everything I've been through and
[14:38 - 14:50] Everything I've gone through. I just I don't know that I am stepping away for a
[14:51 - 14:56] Few days to maybe a week because I need a break guys. I
[14:58 - 15:03] Truly do need a break. I'm tired of this
[15:03 - 15:17] I'm tired of being harassed and attacked because at the end of the day all I'm trying to do
[15:18 - 15:23] It's getting my life back that was stolen from me unfairly by candle Smith
[15:42 - 15:50] My friends in my family mean too much to me
[15:50 - 16:07] I just don't understand why you guys feel like you have to come after me so much
[16:07 - 16:32] I just might say please stop going after my friends in the family
[16:32 - 16:42] I just want to do my life back
Transcribed by lolcow.city as id '1032' on August 7th, 2024
