2021-10-8 HOW I GOT THE WAY I AM

[1:18 - 1:31] Guys, we're normal if you're watching this, but honestly, I hope that you are.
[1:31 - 1:42] Because people like you are the reason that I am the way that I am.
[1:42 - 1:46] People like you, that catfish, good hearted people like me.
[1:46 - 2:02] Let me tell you, when you did what you did to me, pretend to like me and then turn around and fucking use me.
[2:02 - 2:07] Do you have any idea how fucked up that is?
[2:07 - 2:10] I stuck my neck out for you.
[2:10 - 2:12] I defended you.
[2:12 - 2:20] And yet, how did you repay me?
[2:20 - 2:31] By laughing on my face, making fun of me, bashing on me.
[2:31 - 2:43] You act like I don't deserve to be loved.
[2:43 - 2:47] But the truth is, I do.
[2:47 - 2:55] And maybe if people like you, Jasmine, wouldn't do what they do to people like me.
[2:55 - 3:01] And maybe if you and the others hadn't done what you did, I wouldn't be in this fucking position that I'm in.
[3:01 - 3:04] I wouldn't have made the mistakes that I made.
[3:04 - 3:08] I wouldn't have done what I did.
[3:08 - 3:13] You know, it's because of you that me and Caitlin broke up.
[3:13 - 3:17] And let me tell you, that one hurt a whole lot.
[3:17 - 3:19] And I do mean a whole lot.
[3:19 - 3:36] And I'm not just saying that either way.
[3:36 - 3:39] That shit hurt a lot more than you realize.
[3:39 - 3:47] I was actually happy at one point in my life.
[3:47 - 3:58] I actually was happy at one point in my life.
[3:58 - 4:02] Before you came along, Jasmine, over for any of you trolls came along.
[4:02 - 4:05] I was happy.
[4:05 - 4:09] I had a life.
[4:09 - 4:26] I had a wonderful girlfriend and amazing dream job that I had worked so hard to get.
[4:26 - 5:07] And now, I got nothing.
[5:07 - 5:08] You know, Jasmine.
[5:08 - 5:12] And this isn't just for you, Jasmine.
[5:12 - 5:17] This is for all the trolls.
[5:17 - 5:25] Before I started being harassed, and I started being trolled,
[5:25 - 5:30] I actually had a happy life.
[5:30 - 5:35] I was doing good for myself.
[5:35 - 5:44] I had my dream job with one of my best friends.
[5:44 - 5:49] I had a wonderful girlfriend that actually treated me right and didn't treat me like shit.
[5:49 - 5:53] And didn't fucking abuse me.
[5:53 - 6:06] Who is this?
[6:06 - 6:12] Dude, fuck off.
[6:12 - 6:20] No, I'm not gonna get off of YouTube, but you are gonna leave me alone.
[6:20 - 6:34] Well, let me tell you.
[6:34 - 6:48] Before all this shit started, before all this shit started,
[6:48 - 6:51] I actually had a real fucking life.
[6:51 - 7:02] Before all this fucking started, I actually had a real life.
[7:02 - 7:05] I was actually doing good for myself.
[7:05 - 7:09] And I mean real good for myself.
[7:09 - 7:13] I had a great job, wonderful girlfriend.
[7:13 - 7:22] I had all my friends, but now one of my life toys.
[7:22 - 7:23] Nothing.
[7:23 - 7:28] And yet people want to sit there and blame me for what they've done to me.
[7:28 - 7:36] And that's why I was trying to explain to you, Jasmine, and every one of your trolls.
[7:36 - 7:41] All you know how to do is take and take and take.
[7:41 - 7:43] That's all you know how to do.
[7:43 - 8:04] That's all you know how to do is just take and take and take from people.
[8:04 - 8:17] Just let me tell you something you might not realize, Jasmine.
[8:17 - 8:29] Up until this year, for the last eight years, up until this year,
[8:29 - 8:34] I have been abused in every relationship I've been in almost.
[8:34 - 8:43] The only ones I were not abused in was the relationship with Katelyn and the one with Megan.
[8:43 - 8:47] Those are the only fucking two relationships I have not been abused in.
[8:47 - 8:54] All the other relationships I got abused so bad.
[8:54 - 9:03] And when you deal with that for eight plus years, on top of what you do,
[9:03 - 9:07] do you have any idea how fucking screwed up that makes a person?
[9:07 - 9:16] You know, you want to sit there and blame me for shit, but yet you're the one that does all this.
[9:16 - 9:27] Did you ever stop to think that maybe I thought that maybe you actually fucking liked me and wanted to fucking troll?
[9:27 - 9:30] Honestly, Jasmine, I thought you were different.
[9:30 - 9:51] You know, Jasmine, I thought you were motherfucking different from everyone.
[9:51 - 9:54] I thought you were fucking different.
[9:54 - 10:06] I honestly did. I thought you were fucking different.
[10:06 - 10:14] But instead, what did you do?
[10:14 - 10:22] You tore me down, lied to my face, catfished me like I fucking deserved it when I didn't.
[10:22 - 10:28] Yes, I may have made some mistakes. That may be true.
[10:28 - 10:33] That may be true that I may have made some fucked up mistakes I shouldn't have made.
[10:33 - 10:36] But who put me in that position, Jasmine?
[10:36 - 10:46] Who put me in that position, Madison reports?
[10:46 - 10:56] What do you mean?
[10:56 - 11:04] You know, I find it pretty fucked up that y'all think that I deserve to be treated like shit.
[11:04 - 11:07] Like I said, yes, I may have made a few mistakes.
[11:07 - 11:15] Yes, one of my closest friends is like my little sister, maybe a kid, but so fucking what?
[11:15 - 11:29] So fucking what?
[11:29 - 11:32] You know, you're a fucking embarrassment, Jasmine.
[11:32 - 11:36] You really are.
[11:36 - 11:50] You're an embarrassment to actual good people like me who just want to do what they love and be fucking happy with their lives.
[11:50 - 11:52] I used to be happy.
[11:52 - 11:56] I had everything I wanted and fucking more.
[11:56 - 12:01] I'd tell people like you and Madison reports came along and fucked all that up.
[12:01 - 12:11] And you think this is all a fucking joke and then it's all a fucking game.
[12:11 - 12:14] Well, let me tell you right now, it's not.
[12:14 - 12:20] People like you are a cancer in this world.
[12:20 - 12:25] People like you are sickening.
[12:25 - 12:35] And if I'm being honest, people like you don't deserve to live.
[12:35 - 12:44] Because all you do is spread hatred, violence, and more hatred.
[12:44 - 12:56] That's all you fucking do.
[12:56 - 12:58] You feed off of anger.
[12:58 - 13:00] You feed off of hatred.
[13:00 - 13:05] You think I like being angry.
[13:05 - 13:07] You think I like being upset all the time.
[13:07 - 13:10] You think I like being depressed all the time.
[13:10 - 13:12] No, I don't.
[13:12 - 13:21] I fucking hate it.
[13:21 - 13:24] You know, everybody's always been wondering why am I single?
[13:24 - 13:28] Why is somebody like me that actually is a kind person single?
[13:28 - 13:31] Well, now you know the fucking truth.
[13:31 - 13:36] Because of people like Jasmine and people like my ex who will fucking abuse me over time.
[13:36 - 13:42] And basically left me to fucking rot like an empty shell.
[13:42 - 13:46] Now you know why.
[13:46 - 13:59] Let me tell you right now, Jasmine.
[13:59 - 14:03] One day you're going to do this to the wrong person
[14:03 - 14:09] and they're not going to think twice about coming after you.
[14:09 - 14:12] They really won't think twice about coming after you.
[14:12 - 14:28] You really have no idea how hurtful what you did is to me.
[14:28 - 14:34] Right there in front of everyone, you showed your true colors.
[14:34 - 14:44] You showed the evil person that you really are.
[14:44 - 14:48] You know, Jasmine, you can ask anyone that knows me personally.
[14:48 - 14:54] You can ask any of my subscribers that have talked to me on a daily basis.
[14:54 - 15:02] Hell, you can even ask my neighbors around my neighborhood
[15:02 - 15:04] that are still good friends with me.
[15:04 - 15:12] Everyone of them will tell you that I actually am a nice person.
[15:12 - 15:34] I don't get it.
[15:34 - 15:45] I really don't fucking get it.
[15:45 - 15:50] You know, Jasmine, to be honest with you,
[15:50 - 15:55] it took everything in me on Corny's life to not to fucking lose it
[15:55 - 15:58] and break down into fucking tears.
[15:58 - 16:05] Especially when you involved my dead mother.
[16:05 - 16:22] Especially when you involved my biological mother who lost her life.
[16:22 - 16:25] You have no idea how hurtful that was to me
[16:25 - 16:30] and how bad I wanted to be in your ass.
[16:30 - 16:37] You have no idea the harm that you caused people by doing what you do.
[16:37 - 16:46] You have no idea the harm and the destruction you caused.
[16:46 - 16:49] I get it. I made mistakes that I shouldn't have made.
[16:49 - 16:51] I get it.
[16:51 - 16:56] But that doesn't mean you have to fucking carry it on and badger me about it.
[16:56 - 17:11] I just don't see how someone like you, Jasmine, can even sleep at night
[17:11 - 17:14] knowing that you ruined lives.
[17:14 - 17:32] You used to be a good person or so I thought.
[17:32 - 17:56] You know, I wish to God, Jasmine,
[17:56 - 18:05] that you would stop what you're doing
[18:05 - 18:09] and instead of judging me or attacking me,
[18:09 - 18:13] get to fucking know me like a regular human being
[18:13 - 18:24] and maybe then you'd see I'm actually not that bad of a person.
[18:24 - 18:26] You have no idea what you did.
[18:26 - 18:44] Like, you don't understand the level of hurt that it brought.
[18:44 - 18:48] I just wish I could get my life back.
[18:48 - 18:53] The life that you and so many others stole from me, Jasmine,
[18:53 - 18:58] I wish I could get my happiness back that you stole.
[18:58 - 19:14] Like I said, I used to be a good person.
[19:14 - 19:29] I really did. I used to be a good person.
[19:29 - 19:33] But over the time of y'all doing this to me,
[19:33 - 19:48] look what I've become.
[19:48 - 19:50] I just don't understand.
[19:50 - 19:55] I really fucking don't.
[19:55 - 20:06] When you think that someone like me deserves to be treated like shit,
[20:06 - 20:13] I get what I did was fucked up.
[20:13 - 20:23] I understand that.
[20:23 - 20:27] But that doesn't mean you have to constantly harass me about it.
[20:27 - 20:37] You have no idea the pain that you've brought on
[20:37 - 20:43] and the hurt I've had to deal with
[20:43 - 20:47] all night because of you, Jasmine, I've been on and off in tears.
[20:47 - 20:49] Asking, why me?
[20:49 - 20:52] Why do I have to be the one to be a dad?
[20:52 - 20:54] Why do I have to be the one to be bullied?
[20:54 - 21:00] Why do I have to be the one to suffer?
[21:00 - 21:05] Why do I have to be the one that you and me
[21:05 - 21:07] ask who reports bully and pick on?
[21:07 - 21:12] I don't get it.
[21:12 - 21:14] I never asked to be bullied.
[21:14 - 21:17] I never asked to be bashed on.
[21:17 - 21:19] I never asked to be abused
[21:19 - 21:23] or her or tossed a silent cast
[21:23 - 21:27] like I don't matter.
[21:27 - 21:29] Because I'm a human being.
[21:29 - 21:34] I deserve to be with somebody that makes me truly happy.
[21:34 - 21:37] I deserve happiness.
[21:37 - 21:45] I deserve to have a good life.
[21:45 - 21:49] But maybe if people like you and mass hall reports didn't exist,
[21:49 - 21:51] I wouldn't have gotten into the fucking situation
[21:51 - 22:00] that I've gotten into.
[22:00 - 22:04] So Jasmine, you want to preach, take your responsibility.
[22:04 - 22:07] Why don't you and mass hall reports take responsibility
[22:07 - 22:11] for your actions and fuck off?
[22:11 - 22:13] Because you clearly don't take responsibility
[22:13 - 22:20] like you say you do.
[22:20 - 22:23] All you do, Jasmine, is hurt people.
[22:23 - 22:25] That's all you do.
[22:25 - 22:28] And then when you're done, you cast this aside
[22:28 - 22:30] like we don't even fucking matter.
[22:30 - 22:33] Like we're garbage to you.
[22:33 - 22:35] That's all you do.
[22:35 - 23:02] I just wish that you would stop this, Jasmine.
[23:02 - 23:15] I really do.
[23:15 - 23:17] Because you don't know how much it hurts me
[23:17 - 23:23] being put through what I've been put through.
[23:23 - 23:27] Is being happy for once in my life that much to ask?
[23:27 - 23:35] Hello?
[23:35 - 23:45] Hello?
[23:45 - 23:47] I mean, seriously.
[23:47 - 23:55] Is being happy for once really that much to ask for?
[23:55 - 24:01] Is it really that much to fucking ask for?
[24:01 - 24:15] All I've ever asked was to be able to be able to somebody
[24:15 - 24:19] that won't judge me the way that you and mass hall
[24:19 - 24:26] have judged or gone after me.
[24:26 - 24:41] Because when I'm with someone or just anyone in general,
[24:41 - 24:43] why don't you go fuck yourself and leave me alone,
[24:43 - 24:45] you fucking piece of shit?
[24:45 - 24:48] Why don't you go die of AIDS, bitch?
[24:48 - 25:33] Because when you tell Jasmine,
[25:33 - 25:40] people like you are sickening.
[25:40 - 25:43] People like you are a disgrace.
[25:43 - 25:51] To be honest, all I've ever wanted to do was to
[25:51 - 25:54] have a happy life doing what I love
[25:54 - 25:57] and having that special someone that I could be with
[25:57 - 26:00] and lay my head down with at the end of the fucking night.
[26:00 - 26:07] Is wanting to be happy for once in my fucking life
[26:07 - 26:09] really that much to ask for?
[26:09 - 26:14] I mean, are you that fucking jealous
[26:14 - 26:18] of me, Jasmine, that you feel like you have to do this shit?
[26:18 - 26:26] I'm sorry if you're jealous of me,
[26:26 - 26:34] but maybe if you actually got to know me
[26:34 - 26:36] and stop attacking me,
[26:36 - 26:40] you might actually say that I'm not that bad of a person.
[26:40 - 27:00] And that goes for all you other trolls as well.
[27:00 - 27:05] Maybe if you actually take the time out of your day
[27:05 - 27:07] to actually get to know someone
[27:07 - 27:10] and actually sit down and talk to them,
[27:10 - 27:14] instead of judging them,
[27:14 - 27:19] you might actually find out a lot more than you realize.
[27:19 - 27:32] But it's that y'all are so fucking quick to judge.
[27:32 - 27:34] You think I like lashing out.
[27:34 - 27:37] You think I like saying hurtful things.
[27:37 - 27:44] I don't. I hate it.
[27:44 - 27:52] But when you're pushed so far, what do you expect?
[27:52 - 27:54] What do you really expect?
[27:54 - 28:07] Let me tell you right now,
[28:07 - 28:11] I'm not the evil person that people make me out to be.
[28:11 - 28:15] Yes, I have a friend that's like my little sister who's 14.
[28:15 - 28:17] So what?
[28:17 - 28:20] That shouldn't fucking matter.
[28:20 - 28:27] Nothing sexual is going on.
[28:27 - 28:29] I've proven that.
[28:29 - 28:38] But what I want to know is why target me?
[28:38 - 28:42] Why target me?
[28:42 - 28:46] I don't understand.
[28:46 - 28:52] I never asked to be trolled.
[28:52 - 28:56] I never asked to be harassed.
[28:56 - 29:01] All I've said, all I've ever wanted, which is something I'm 74,
[29:01 - 29:06] all I've ever wanted was a happy life with someone that I love
[29:06 - 29:12] and to have my dream job with a good woman right beside me,
[29:12 - 29:20] someone who's loyal and faithful and won't fucking judge me.
[29:20 - 29:23] Is that really that fucking much to ask for?
[29:23 - 29:40] That's all I've ever wanted.
[29:40 - 29:45] Was happiness.
[29:45 - 29:48] And a good job.
[29:48 - 29:50] Yet I always get blamed.
[29:50 - 29:53] I always get made out to be the bad guy.
[29:53 - 29:57] When truthfully, I'm not the bad guy.
[29:57 - 30:03] I'm really not.
[30:03 - 30:15] I've been trolled, tricked, and yet I'm still the bad guy.
[30:15 - 30:20] And I don't understand how.
[30:20 - 30:22] I really don't understand how.
[30:22 - 30:35] I honestly wish you trolls would just go away and leave me alone.
[30:35 - 30:39] I really do.
[30:39 - 30:46] Because I never asked for any of this.
[30:46 - 30:51] I never asked to lose my girlfriend.
[30:51 - 30:54] I never asked to lose my job with my best friend.
[30:54 - 30:58] I never asked to lose my best friend of almost 10 years.
[30:58 - 31:02] I never asked for that.
[31:02 - 31:10] But where did I get taken advantage of, stolen from?
[31:10 - 31:29] You know, Jasmine, you truly are a piece of shit.
[31:29 - 31:36] You know that, Jasmine?
[31:36 - 31:40] You truly are a piece of shit for what you do to people like me.
[31:40 - 31:59] But now you guys know the truth about why I'm single and why I got the way that I am.
[31:59 - 32:03] It's not that I asked to be like this.
[32:03 - 32:09] It's that I got pushed into this.
[32:09 - 32:13] I don't like it.
[32:13 - 32:15] I want to have a wonderful job.
[32:15 - 32:30] I want to have a wonderful girlfriend that I can call my own again.
[32:30 - 32:34] But because of all these shit that went on, I don't have that.
[32:34 - 32:41] But at least now you guys know the truth about how I got the way that I am.
[32:41 - 32:44] Does it hurt? Yes.
[32:44 - 32:46] Is it embarrassing?
[32:46 - 32:48] More than you know.
[32:48 - 32:50] But I don't deserve this.
[32:50 - 32:53] I deserve happiness for what it's my life.
[32:53 - 32:55] I really do.
[32:55 - 33:17] Jasmine, I just wish you saw the day that you got it.
[33:17 - 33:22] I just want my life back.
[33:22 - 33:26] I want to be happy again.
[33:26 - 33:35] I don't even say guys.
[33:35 - 33:41] I got to go because I don't know about the way to having a lot of bosses.
[33:41 - 33:47] But I hope you guys now see how I got the way that I am.
[33:47 - 33:53] I love you guys.
[33:53 - 33:56] I'll catch you guys later.