2021-10-20 Broken and Shattered

[1:35 - 1:39] Yo, I don't understand every single thing
[1:39 - 1:41] Everybody wanna try to take with me
[1:41 - 1:45] Lost my life two years ago
[1:45 - 1:47] To a poor little thing
[1:47 - 1:52] Did more harm to me than I could ever know
[1:52 - 1:55] I just want my life back
[1:55 - 2:00] I just wanna be strong
[2:00 - 2:03] Sick of this motherfucking pain
[2:03 - 2:06] That I feel deep inside
[2:06 - 2:10] Every day it won't go away
[2:10 - 2:13] It stays with me constantly
[2:13 - 2:17] And I just don't know what to do
[2:17 - 2:20] Anymore, it's kind of like
[2:20 - 2:28] I'm locked inside my own
[2:28 - 2:31] My own head, I'm locked inside
[2:31 - 2:35] Every day, always angry
[2:35 - 2:38] Because of what people say
[2:38 - 2:40] What they do to me
[2:40 - 2:42] They don't realize
[2:42 - 2:45] That they fully didn't push me
[2:45 - 2:48] To this point, to the point
[2:48 - 2:51] That I want no critical part
[2:51 - 2:54] I wanna put a bullet in
[2:54 - 2:57] Every one of them
[2:57 - 3:00] I'm so sick of
[3:00 - 3:03] So fucking sick of
[3:03 - 3:06] Feeling this anguish
[3:06 - 3:09] This hatred, this pain
[3:09 - 3:12] This rage, I'm sick of
[3:12 - 3:15] Having this fake ass
[3:15 - 3:17] Smile on my face
[3:17 - 3:20] Pretending that I'm okay
[3:20 - 3:23] When I'm not
[3:23 - 3:26] I just wanna make the pain
[3:26 - 3:28] Disappear
[3:28 - 3:30] God, can't please
[3:30 - 3:32] Someone make this
[3:32 - 3:34] Hatred and this anguish
[3:34 - 3:41] And this pain and this sorrow stop
[3:41 - 3:44] I'm so fucking sick of
[3:44 - 3:48] Feeling like I'm gonna die
[3:48 - 3:52] At any time, nobody understands
[3:52 - 3:55] What it's like to be me
[3:55 - 4:03] On the end
[4:03 - 4:08] Be somebody other than myself
[4:08 - 4:11] But on me
[4:11 - 4:15] Why is this that everybody
[4:15 - 4:17] Has to bully me
[4:17 - 4:19] I don't understand it
[4:19 - 4:29] God, why me?
[4:29 - 4:32] No, I don't understand
[4:32 - 4:35] Why me? Why now?
[4:35 - 4:37] Why make my knife
[4:37 - 4:40] Crumbling up on the floor
[4:40 - 4:43] To the ground like broken pieces
[4:43 - 4:47] Of a statue
[4:47 - 4:50] Feel like my knife
[4:50 - 4:52] Crumbling down the ground
[4:52 - 5:44] I just want my life
[5:44 - 5:48] I just want my life
[5:48 - 6:11] I just don't know what to do
[6:11 - 8:35] Anymore it's John
[8:35 - 8:39] I just want my life
[8:39 - 9:03] I just don't know what to do
[9:03 - 9:19] Anymore it's John
[9:19 - 9:23] I'm so fucking sick of
[9:23 - 9:30] Feeling like I'm gonna die
[9:30 - 9:43] At any time, nobody understands
[9:43 - 10:20] What it's like to be me
[10:20 - 10:23] On the end
[10:23 - 10:38] Be somebody other than myself
[10:38 - 10:40] But on me
[10:40 - 11:03] Why is this that everybody
[11:03 - 11:06] Has to bully me
[11:06 - 12:25] I don't understand
[16:21 - 16:25] What it can be
[16:25 - 16:27] What is it exactly
[16:27 - 16:29] The pain is taking you out
[16:29 - 16:31] And this is affecting
[16:31 - 16:33] The pain is taking you out
[16:33 - 16:37] The pain is taking you down
[16:37 - 16:41] Like I want to die
[16:41 - 16:42] In the glass
[16:42 - 16:43] Stab with your tongue
[16:43 - 16:45] Ah, very affront
[16:45 - 16:47] Try to wake up
[16:47 - 16:49] Ah, cannibal class
[16:49 - 16:51] Cannibal sun
[16:51 - 17:03] Ah, very affront
[17:03 - 17:05] Want to hand me
[17:05 - 17:08] Hand me
[17:08 - 17:10] Hand me
[17:10 - 17:12] Hand me
[17:12 - 17:14] Hand me
[17:14 - 17:16] Hand me
[17:16 - 17:19] Hand me
[17:19 - 17:21] Hand me
[17:21 - 17:23] Hand me
[17:23 - 17:25] Hand me
[17:25 - 17:29] Hand me
[17:29 - 17:32] Hand me
[17:32 - 17:34] Hand me
[17:34 - 17:36] Hand me
[17:36 - 17:38] Hand me
[17:38 - 17:40] Hand me
[17:40 - 17:44] know where from the start let's jump all apart because i'm so expensive
[17:44 - 17:48] it's probably something that shouldn't be said about me
[17:48 - 17:51] honestly i thought that i would be late but no
[17:51 - 17:58] calling security keeping my head low i read the hatchet of very fun
[17:58 - 18:07] right because i can't say no i can't say no
[18:07 - 18:45] and my limbs are
[18:45 - 18:52] why don't you want to know why i do want to know
[18:52 - 18:58] why do you want to know why do you want to know
[18:58 - 19:00] why do you want to know when we all fall asleep
[19:00 - 19:30] where do we go find your ozephyx though
[19:30 - 19:33] ask your healthcare provider today about ozephyx
[19:33 - 22:08] two things you don't be able to say but i know i can't say the name
[22:08 - 22:11] last night and i'm from the city
[22:11 - 22:17] years after i woke up and i didn't say a word on any day
[22:17 - 22:22] i can't ever know i just want my life back
[22:22 - 22:25] i didn't know when we were heading back
[22:25 - 22:31] i'm so sick of this wonderful kid playing
[22:31 - 22:35] that i feel deep inside every day
[22:35 - 22:44] i just don't know what to do
[22:44 - 23:04] oh it's kind of like i'm someone
[23:04 - 23:35] i push right to this point it is
[23:35 - 23:37] pain it is rage
[23:37 - 23:39] i change my pain
[23:39 - 23:42] and it is a cage as a smile
[23:42 - 23:45] i think friends hate me
[23:45 - 23:50] i'm okay and i'm not
[23:50 - 24:18] i just want the pain of hatred
[24:18 - 29:22] i'm a mystery ain't got a wedding ring
[29:22 - 29:24] don't need your empathy though it's embarrassing
[29:24 - 32:56] i kind of miss it though and it's my soft phone never let out
[32:56 - 32:59] i'm not giving for me i'm giving for you
[32:59 - 33:59] transcend humanity with omen
[33:59 - 34:25] yeah this is my reality every single day
[34:25 - 34:29] everybody judge at me and say that they want to get at me
[34:29 - 34:33] they don't really understand what it's like to be me
[34:33 - 34:36] all they see is the broken kid they don't see
[34:36 - 34:44] pain they don't see you're a single thing i'm living inside of the reality
[34:44 - 34:48] nobody really understands what i'm going through
[34:48 - 34:58] in the land they know it's like to be
[34:58 - 35:01] only the other side of me i'm falling every single day
[35:01 - 35:10] i'm all these things that i'm not in this
[35:10 - 35:20] don't need more fucking and i just wanted to go away
[35:20 - 35:42] craziest is calling me sad meaning that way it's so
[35:42 - 35:49] need a sleeping night with all these demons and a face
[35:49 - 35:52] deep inside my fucking mind
[35:52 - 35:58] do you see what it's like to be dead inside
[35:58 - 36:02] do you know what it's like to lose your best friend
[36:02 - 36:13] to a murder and just suicide will be a bullet for soul
[36:13 - 36:20] god damn long in this position when
[36:20 - 36:25] that's when this is on for the same thing that
[36:25 - 36:32] the time i feel like it's about to fall
[36:32 - 36:42] as fast as i can just to reach the ground beneath
[36:42 - 36:49] i see it starting it's black your face
[36:49 - 37:13] turning right fucking sick i'm so fucking sick
[37:13 - 37:55] we stuff races take five with five flavors because you can't
[37:55 - 40:40] hit i won't get a theory in the silence of the answers
[40:40 - 40:45] and we see no more than that it's like i'm standing in my own grip
[40:45 - 40:49] wondering why we everything wondering will it all
[40:49 - 40:53] disappear winning all this go away i just wanted to
[40:53 - 40:56] all disappear i'm so sick of being this
[40:56 - 41:00] monster that everybody's been make me up to be i don't
[41:00 - 41:05] understand it why is it that everybody looking at me like i'm from
[41:05 - 41:10] another planet i don't get it i don't want it i don't need it
[41:10 - 41:21] body acting like a soul motherfucker get defeated
[41:21 - 41:27] you see the fake trial on my face that i put on every single mother fucking
[41:27 - 41:29] take you don't know what it's like to be
[41:29 - 41:34] broken for you bros here's you don't know what it's like to be in my shoes always
[41:34 - 41:39] being motherfucking angry yet everyone around you especially
[41:39 - 41:43] those that have ever fucking doubted you you don't know
[41:43 - 41:46] what it's like to lose your best friend on the run
[41:46 - 41:53] motherfucking 98 a fucking true man i'm so sick of losing everything around me
[41:53 - 41:56] everybody i get revived always turning the
[41:56 - 42:01] motherfucking back to me oh no reason it set to believe
[42:01 - 42:10] i am within the sky i say goodbye to this twitter
[42:10 - 42:16] on the air and then tie it up be a crowd you enter some
[42:16 - 42:21] idiotic motherfucking portion i am not someone that you can pull it
[42:21 - 42:30] don't deep down i'm testing for more
[42:30 - 43:05] i should take this 45 eight teachers who's a motherfucking lesson
[43:05 - 43:09] what it's like to be more than entertaining i just want to be
[43:09 - 43:15] myself and my motherfucking family
[43:15 - 43:25] i'm so deep inside me every fucking day everybody
[43:25 - 43:39] telling me that i just need people and let me do what i gotta do to succeed
[43:39 - 43:49] because these motherfuckers don't know what it's like to be me
[43:49 - 43:57] you don't understand it so how can you judge what you don't understand
[43:57 - 44:09] okay i'm so sick of all of you motherfucking church of me acting like you got a group
[44:09 - 44:15] that you know who i am just because my personal information is
[44:15 - 44:19] all upon the internet that don't mean you fucking know me that don't mean you
[44:19 - 44:26] know me at all because truth is you never knew me at all
[44:26 - 44:29] soda is the only beat-making tool designed specifically for artists to
[44:29 - 44:56] replace type
[45:31 - 45:42] in the field
[45:42 - 45:47] you don't know what it's like to be a pro for two years
[45:47 - 45:51] you don't know what it's like to be a modules always be a motherfucking
[45:51 - 45:55] angry yet every one of you especially
[45:55 - 46:00] those that have ever fucking doubted you don't know what it's like to lose your
[46:00 - 46:02] best
[46:08 - 46:11] everybody
[46:34 - 46:36] and i am not
[46:57 - 47:34] Yeah Jordan, what up man? Wait Jordan are you the same Jordan that I spoke with on
[47:34 - 48:20] Facebook? Are you that same Jordan? Yeah that's what I thought. Hang on man.
[48:33 - 48:55] Disappear, quit it all, just go away, I just don't want to do it all. Disappear, I'm so sick of being pissed off, I'll sit there. Everybody's been making me yo-to-pe-y-toe. Understandin' why is it that every client will kidnap me, knock up from another planet. I don't get it, I don't want it, I don't need it.
[48:55 - 49:24] Founzy versus the old family dish towel, dry with a fresh sheet of founzy and use your hands cleaner than a used dish towel that can carry and redistribute.
[49:24 - 49:28] Charmin Ultrasoft is twice, can we have-
[49:28 - 51:42] Am I really the villain or am I just another choker looking for a little motherfuckin' piece? Everybody's always wanted tryna turn me into another fuckin' piece.
[51:42 - 51:54] I'm so sick of being made, I don't be a motherfuckin' pain in what I'm not. I'm just a pro-painting, tryna find his way through the maze of the right to wrongs every single day.
[51:54 - 52:03] Tryna do what I know, just bein' my team and my motherfuckin' crew. Just do what I gotta do to survive.
[52:03 - 52:16] Tryna keep my head up all the wonder every single day of my life. I don't understand why is it that you won't try to trick me, try to troll me, try to make me out to be something that I'm not.
[52:16 - 52:26] I don't understand the name, why is it that you gotta bully me? What did I ever do to deserve anything that you ever threw to me?
[52:26 - 52:43] Tryna do what I know, just bein' my team and my motherfuckin' crew. Just do what I gotta do to survive.
[52:43 - 52:53] Tryna keep my head up all the wonder every single day of my life. I don't understand why is it that you won't try to trick me, try to make me out to be something that I'm not.
[52:54 - 53:09] Y'all don't understand what it's like to be me. I connect with the Joker on a real fuckin' level cause I am him. He is me. We are one. We are we. You won't understand what it's like to be in my shoes.
[53:09 - 53:19] Going through the night music. Everybody fuckin' charging you. Cause you're lookin' up a little bit. We're from everybody in society.
[53:19 - 53:32] You don't know what it's like to be labeled as offended by every motherfuckin' one of your peers. Everybody that used to be your friend is now.
[53:32 - 53:46] Turnin' back on you. Yeah, you walk this room alone. Are you ready? No. No. Which way you're going? That is mine. Mine. Not the side of fuckin' cages. I'm a fuckin' mind. Every day of my life I deal with this.
[53:47 - 53:56] Motherfuckin' chaos is runnin' through my fuckin' mind. Every time I wanna take a photo to the brain, it's just a fuckin' time.
[53:56 - 54:13] All because of everything that everybody's put me through. That is not the fuckin' thing. But that's what you make me out to be.
[54:14 - 54:21] You make me out to be your motherfuckin' bitch. Constantly attacking me. Trudgin' me. Mamin' me.
[54:21 - 54:31] Bananin' in me. Ain't no fusing me. Method me. Freaking me down. And destroyin' me. So then I feel like I am fuckin' nothin'.
[54:31 - 54:39] But I know deep down I'm strokin' it. Just to get up again. I'm so sick and tired of being walked on.
[54:39 - 54:51] Bein' tickin' it. I did the job by everybody. I just wanna be another somebody.
[54:51 - 54:59] Fuckin' nobody in the jar.
[57:15 - 57:21] Every single day I try to do what I know. Just a me and my team of my own.
[57:21 - 57:25] All the fuckin' cool. Just to do what I gotta do.