Original upload date: December 26th, 2020 (automatically grabbed from title)
[0:00 - 0:28] What's up guys? Today I wanted to do something special. I'm going to show you some of the
[0:28 - 0:50] special. I wanted to do something special for everyone that was not only a fan of the band
[0:50 - 1:17] but friends, family. On July 21st, 2017 we lost one of the best music artists of all
[1:17 - 1:30] time. We lost the voice of a generation. We lost somebody who would define music as a
[1:30 - 1:51] whole and revolutionized it for a very, very long time. That person was the late and great
[1:51 - 2:05] Chester Bennington. And a lot of people wonder why I speak so highly about him. And let me
[2:05 - 2:15] tell you there's many reasons. It wasn't just because he had good music. He had music
[2:15 - 2:26] that was relatable. He faced a lot of problems that nobody spoke about. Now people were afraid
[2:26 - 2:38] to speak about it and he made it okay to speak about those problems. Because he went through
[2:38 - 2:46] a lot of those problems. As did I. You can ask anybody in the world they will tell you
[2:46 - 2:57] who one of the most important bands in music history is from the early 2000s. And nine
[2:57 - 3:02] times out of ten they'll all say the same thing, Lincoln Park. Because Lincoln Park
[3:02 - 3:15] revolutionized music as a whole. And there will never be another like Chester at all.
[3:15 - 3:26] So this show is for somebody who was not only revered in the music industry as one of the
[3:26 - 3:34] best music artists of all time. If not the best music artists of all time. But somebody
[3:34 - 3:40] who is a hero to me, a hero to friends of mine and a hero to many others around the
[3:40 - 3:58] world. This show is in honor of the late and great Chester Bennington. Look at those #RIPChesters
[3:58 - 4:27] on the left. Let me know in the comments, y'all. It's us with one. Oh, I know. It's so
[4:27 - 4:53] unreal. Watch you go. I tried so hard and got so far. But in the end, it doesn't even
[4:53 - 5:06] matter. I had to fall to lose it all. But in the end, it doesn't even matter. I don't
[5:06 - 5:11] know why. It doesn't even matter how hard I try. Cute down the mind and the designs
[5:11 - 5:19] run to remind myself why I tried so hard. That's not ghost body and property. Remember
[5:19 - 5:47] you ain't never tried to fight with me. It got so far. But in the end, it doesn't even
[5:47 - 6:05] matter. I had to fall to lose it all. It doesn't even matter. I've put my trust in you. Push
[6:05 - 6:19] as far as I can go. For all this, there's only one thing you should know. I've put
[6:19 - 6:33] my trust in you. Push as far as I can go. For all this, there's only one thing you
[6:33 - 6:46] should know. I tried so hard and got so far. But in the end, it doesn't even matter. I
[6:46 - 7:06] had to fall to lose it all. But in the end, it doesn't even matter.
[7:06 - 7:34] This is coach Dave Lonsden. Watch Eagles versus Cowboys. Sunday on. I'm going to be in the
[7:34 - 11:18] [MUSIC]
[11:18 - 11:21] Never be another one like him ever.
[11:21 - 11:24] [MUSIC]
[11:24 - 11:27] The man was a fucking genius.
[11:27 - 11:43] [MUSIC]
[11:43 - 11:50] When I was confused.
[11:50 - 11:55] [MUSIC]
[11:55 - 11:56] Inside of me.
[11:56 - 12:01] [MUSIC]
[12:01 - 12:02] Nothing to lose.
[12:02 - 12:28] [MUSIC]
[12:28 - 12:33] Somewhere I belong.
[12:33 - 12:36] [MUSIC]
[12:36 - 12:38] I was confused.
[12:38 - 12:42] [MUSIC]
[12:42 - 12:43] Someone of mine.
[12:43 - 12:48] [MUSIC]
[12:48 - 12:49] Nothing to lose.
[12:49 - 12:54] [MUSIC]
[12:54 - 12:55] I wanna heal.
[12:55 - 12:57] I wanna feel.
[12:57 - 13:00] When a time was never real.
[13:00 - 13:06] I wanna find some of the pain I felt so long.
[13:06 - 13:07] I wanna heal.
[13:07 - 13:09] I wanna feel.
[13:09 - 13:12] I can feel something real.
[13:12 - 13:17] I wanna find something I wanted all along.
[13:17 - 13:19] Somewhere I belong.
[13:19 - 13:21] Yeah, I would never know.
[13:21 - 13:25] Myself and time to the sun on my own.
[13:25 - 13:31] And I would never feel anything else until my wounds are healed.
[13:31 - 13:35] I would never make anything time.
[13:35 - 13:37] Break away from me.
[13:37 - 13:39] I will break away.
[13:39 - 13:47] I'll find myself today.
[13:47 - 13:49] I wanna heal.
[13:49 - 13:51] I wanna feel.
[13:51 - 13:53] When a time was never real.
[13:53 - 13:59] I wanna make a world of pain I felt so long.
[13:59 - 14:01] I wanna heal.
[14:01 - 14:03] I wanna feel.
[14:03 - 14:05] I feel something real.
[14:05 - 14:10] I wanna find something I wanted all along.
[14:10 - 14:15] Somewhere I belong.
[14:15 - 14:21] Yeah, somewhere I belong.
[14:21 - 14:33] Somewhere I belong.
[14:33 - 15:01] Put the magic back into your holiday season with a new vehicle from Magic City MotorCars.
[15:01 - 15:06] Find a huge selection of high quality, inspected 4-wheel drive vehicles all at a great price.
[15:06 - 15:09] Is your car waiting for the...
[15:09 - 15:41] ...
[15:41 - 15:44] Waking and sweating again.
[15:44 - 15:47] Another day's been made to waste.
[15:47 - 15:51] In my disgrace.
[15:51 - 15:53] Stuck in my hand again.
[15:53 - 15:57] Feels like I'll never leave this place.
[15:57 - 15:59] There's no escape.
[15:59 - 16:03] I'm my only enemy.
[16:03 - 16:05] I'm human.
[16:05 - 16:10] I'm the single billing.
[16:10 - 16:13] Is there not a new concern?
[16:13 - 16:18] Take this all away.
[16:18 - 16:20] I'm suffocating.
[16:20 - 16:27] Tell me what the fuck is wrong with me.
[16:27 - 16:29] I don't know what to take.
[16:29 - 16:33] Thought I was focused but I'm scared.
[16:33 - 16:36] I'm not prepared.
[16:36 - 16:39] I am prepared only.
[16:39 - 16:42] Looking for help somehow somewhere.
[16:42 - 16:45] Ain't no one cares.
[16:45 - 16:49] I'm my own worst enemy.
[16:49 - 16:51] I'm human.
[16:51 - 16:56] I'm the single billing.
[16:56 - 16:59] Is there not a new concern?
[16:59 - 17:03] Take this all away.
[17:03 - 17:05] I'm suffocating.
[17:05 - 17:12] Tell me what the fuck is wrong with me.
[17:17 - 17:23] Fuck!
[17:23 - 17:37] Put me out of my misery.
[17:37 - 17:39] Put me out of my...
[17:39 - 17:49] Put me out of my fucking misery.
[18:01 - 18:11] I'm human.
[18:11 - 18:15] Take this all away.
[18:15 - 18:17] I'm suffocating.
[18:17 - 18:25] Tell me what the fuck is wrong with me.
[18:25 - 18:43] Take!
[18:43 - 18:48] You know, there's one thing that not a lot of people know about Chester.
[18:48 - 18:54] He had a lot of demons that he was fighting and struggling with.
[18:54 - 18:56] And I mean a lot.
[18:56 - 18:59] And a lot of those demons that he faces,
[18:59 - 19:06] a lot of us, like myself, face every day.
[19:06 - 19:10] You see, as a child, he was molested.
[19:10 - 19:14] And as he grew older,
[19:14 - 19:17] he suffered from depression,
[19:17 - 19:19] alcohol addiction,
[19:19 - 19:22] drug addiction,
[19:22 - 19:29] which ultimately led to him
[19:29 - 19:35] having to go to see a therapist,
[19:35 - 19:39] which ultimately led to his depression.
[19:39 - 19:43] And these things are things that he spoke about very much in his songs.
[19:43 - 19:48] His songs weren't just songs.
[19:48 - 19:53] They were a chronicle of his life.
[19:53 - 20:01] They were messages to people to show people that they're not alone in their fight.
[20:01 - 20:06] And more importantly, they were a cry for help.
[20:06 - 20:18] Help that nobody saw until it was too late.
[20:18 - 20:22] And I myself suffer from depression.
[20:22 - 20:28] I'm a survivor of suicide of several attempts.
[20:28 - 20:32] You know,
[20:32 - 20:37] I've been through addiction, but it's not the addiction that people think.
[20:37 - 20:42] The addiction that I dealt with was the addiction of being abused.
[20:42 - 20:45] Because a lot of people might not know this,
[20:45 - 20:48] but for 11 years straight up to this year,
[20:48 - 20:50] well, including this year,
[20:50 - 20:59] I had been in several mentally, verbally, and emotionally abusive relationships.
[20:59 - 21:04] And it got so bad to the point where
[21:04 - 21:10] it almost felt good to be abused,
[21:10 - 21:15] because at least I was feeling something.
[21:15 - 21:20] For me, when I was being mentally and verbally and emotionally abused,
[21:20 - 21:24] I began to like it.
[21:24 - 21:27] I began to like the abuse,
[21:27 - 21:32] because even though I was numb to everything around me,
[21:32 - 21:35] at least I was feeling something.
[21:35 - 21:38] Whether it was positive or negative, I didn't care.
[21:38 - 21:47] All I knew is that I was able to feel something.
[21:47 - 21:51] And it wasn't until many years later that I realized
[21:51 - 21:56] that I didn't deserve the abuse that I had gotten.
[21:56 - 22:02] I didn't deserve the hell that I got put through.
[22:02 - 22:06] And funny thing about that,
[22:06 - 22:09] I'm not the only one that faces it.
[22:09 - 22:15] Many people every day suffer from many forms of abuse.
[22:15 - 22:18] Abuse can come in many forms,
[22:18 - 22:28] whether it's physical, emotional, mental, verbal.
[22:28 - 22:42] At the end of the day, abuse is abuse, no matter how you look at it.
[22:42 - 22:50] And this song, I think, really speaks on the numbness that you feel
[22:50 - 22:54] when you get put through those things.
[22:55 - 22:58] The Ultimate RB Show National Tour is heading to you.
[22:58 - 23:01] Join us for special RB Showbranks at the largest...
[23:01 - 23:18] I want to see those hashtags in the comments.
[23:18 - 23:23] #RIPTresser #NoMoreAbuse #NotAlone
[23:23 - 23:26] #Trying to be what you want me to be
[23:26 - 23:28] #Feeling so faithless
[23:28 - 23:31] #What's under the surface
[23:31 - 23:35] #Don't know what you're expecting of me
[23:35 - 23:43] #But under the pressure of walking in your shoes
[23:43 - 23:52] #Every step that I take is another mistake to you
[23:52 - 23:55] #I become so numb
[23:55 - 23:58] #I can't feel you there
[23:58 - 24:00] #Become so tired
[24:00 - 24:02] #So much more aware
[24:02 - 24:04] #I'm becoming this
[24:04 - 24:06] #All I want to do
[24:06 - 24:10] #There's been more like me and me last night
[24:10 - 24:14] #Can't you see that you're smothering me?
[24:14 - 24:16] #Holding to sight
[24:16 - 24:19] #We afraid to lose control
[24:19 - 24:23] #Cause everything that you thought I would be
[24:23 - 24:25] #Is falling apart
[24:25 - 24:31] #Right in front of you
[24:31 - 24:33] #In every second I waste
[24:33 - 24:39] #There's more than ever a mistake to you
[24:39 - 24:42] #In every second I waste
[24:42 - 24:45] #There's more than I can take
[24:45 - 24:48] #I become so numb
[24:48 - 24:50] #I can't feel you there
[24:50 - 24:52] #Become so tired
[24:52 - 24:54] #So much more aware
[24:54 - 24:56] #I'm becoming this
[24:56 - 24:58] #All I want to do
[24:58 - 25:00] #There's been more like me
[25:00 - 25:02] #And me last night
[25:02 - 25:06] #Can't you see that you're smothering me?
[25:06 - 25:08] #I can't feel you there
[25:08 - 25:10] #Become so tired
[25:10 - 25:12] #So much more aware
[25:12 - 25:14] #I'm becoming this
[25:14 - 25:16] #All I want to do
[25:16 - 25:19] #There's more than ever a mistake to you
[25:19 - 25:22] #I become so numb
[25:22 - 25:24] #I can't feel you there
[25:24 - 25:26] #Become so tired
[25:26 - 25:28] #So much more aware
[25:28 - 25:30] #I'm becoming this
[25:30 - 25:32] #All I want to do
[25:32 - 25:34] #There's been more like me
[25:34 - 25:36] #And me last night
[25:36 - 25:39] #Can't you see that you're smothering me?
[25:39 - 25:42] #I become so numb
[25:42 - 25:45] #Trying to be what you want
[25:45 - 25:48] #To be what you want me to be
[25:48 - 25:53] #I become so numb
[25:53 - 25:57] #Trying to be what you want me to be
[25:57 - 26:14] #I don't like my mind right now
[26:14 - 26:17] #I can have problems that are so unnecessary
[26:17 - 26:20] #Wish that I could slow things down
[26:20 - 26:22] #I want to let go
[26:22 - 26:24] #But there's comfort in the panic
[26:24 - 26:27] #And I drive myself crazy
[26:27 - 26:30] #Thinking everything's about me
[26:30 - 26:33] #And I drive myself crazy
[26:33 - 26:36] #Because I can't see the gravity
[26:36 - 26:40] #I'm holding on
[26:40 - 26:43] #Why is everything so heavy?
[26:43 - 26:46] #I'm holding on
[26:46 - 26:49] #So much more than I can carry
[26:49 - 26:51] #I keep dragging around
[26:51 - 26:53] #What's bringing me down
[26:53 - 26:55] #If I just let go
[26:55 - 26:56] #I'd be separate
[26:56 - 26:59] #Holding on
[26:59 - 27:02] #Why is everything so heavy?
[27:02 - 27:05] #You say that I'm paranoid
[27:05 - 27:08] #But I'm pretty sure the world's down to get me
[27:08 - 27:11] #It's not like I make a choice
[27:11 - 27:13] #It's a little bit of mercy
[27:13 - 27:15] #It's so fucking messy
[27:15 - 27:18] #I know I'm not the center of the universe
[27:18 - 27:21] #But you can spin around me just the same
[27:21 - 27:24] #I know I'm not the center of the universe
[27:24 - 27:27] #But you can spin around me just the same
[27:27 - 27:31] #Holding on
[27:31 - 27:34] #Why is everything so heavy?
[27:34 - 27:37] #Holding on
[27:37 - 27:40] #Someone's running I can't carry
[27:40 - 27:42] #I keep dragging around
[27:42 - 27:44] #What's bringing me down
[27:44 - 27:46] #If I just let go
[27:46 - 27:47] #I'd be separate
[27:47 - 27:50] #Holding on
[27:50 - 27:53] #Why is everything so heavy?
[27:53 - 27:57] #I know I'm not the center of the universe
[27:57 - 28:00] #But you can spin around me just the same
[28:00 - 28:03] #I know I'm not the center of the universe
[28:03 - 28:06] #He's spinning around me just the same
[28:06 - 28:09] #And I drive my soul crazy
[28:09 - 28:12] #Thinking everything's about me
[28:12 - 28:15] #Holding on
[28:15 - 28:18] #Why is everything so heavy?
[28:18 - 28:22] #Holding on
[28:22 - 28:25] #Someone's running I can't carry
[28:25 - 28:27] #I keep dragging around
[28:27 - 28:29] #What's bringing me down
[28:29 - 28:30] #If I just let go
[28:30 - 28:31] #I'd be separate
[28:31 - 28:35] #Holding on
[28:35 - 28:57] #Why is everything so heavy?
[28:57 - 29:18] #What keeps me going during the sun?
[29:18 - 29:23] #Oh no! Another pizza deal it's carry out only?
[29:23 - 29:28] #And producing the new $10 tastemaker from Pizza!
[29:28 - 29:33] This song is called "My December"
[29:33 - 29:35] and this is going to anyone out there
[29:35 - 29:40] who suffers from depression, anxiety,
[29:40 - 29:44] or any of those things that are bringing you down.
[29:44 - 29:48] This is for you.
[29:48 - 29:53] #This is my December
[29:53 - 29:58] #This is my time of my year
[29:58 - 30:02] #This is my December
[30:02 - 30:06] #This is also key
[30:06 - 30:12] #This is my December
[30:12 - 30:16] #This is me so covered up
[30:16 - 30:21] #This is my December
[30:21 - 30:24] #This is me alone
[30:24 - 30:43] #And I
[30:43 - 30:48] #And I give it all away
[30:48 - 30:53] #Just to have somewhere to go to
[30:53 - 30:58] #Give it all away
[30:58 - 31:04] #Just as I'm one to come home to
[31:04 - 31:09] #This is my December
[31:09 - 31:14] #This is my snow-color dreams
[31:14 - 31:19] #This is my pretend day
[31:19 - 31:22] #This is all a dream
[31:22 - 31:26] #All in one life
[31:26 - 31:41] #And I
[31:41 - 31:46] #And I'd give it all away
[31:46 - 31:51] #Just to have somewhere to go to
[31:51 - 31:56] #Give it all away
[31:56 - 32:02] #Just as I'm one to come home to
[32:02 - 32:07] #This is my December
[32:07 - 32:12] #This is my time of my year
[32:12 - 32:16] #This is my December
[32:16 - 32:21] #This is also key
[32:21 - 32:25] #No, no way
[32:25 - 32:30] #Just to have somewhere to go to
[32:30 - 32:34] #Give it all away
[32:34 - 32:39] #Just as I'm one to come home to
[32:39 - 32:44] #Give it all away
[32:44 - 32:49] #Just to have somewhere to go to
[32:49 - 32:54] #Give it all away
[32:54 - 33:00] #Just as I'm one to come home to
[33:01 - 33:06] #Give it all away
[33:06 - 33:11] #Just as I'm one to come home to
[33:11 - 33:16] #Give it all away
[33:16 - 33:21] #Just as I'm one to come home to
[33:21 - 33:26] #Give it all away
[33:26 - 33:31] #Just as I'm one to come home to
[33:31 - 33:36] #Give it all away
[33:36 - 33:41] #Just as I'm one to come home to
[33:41 - 33:54] #Give it all away
[33:54 - 34:01] with an action film. Watch it all on your go-to app for videos. Find your next movie on YouTube.
[34:01 - 34:27] I don't know who the trust is.
[34:27 - 34:35] I don't know who the trust is. No surprise.
[34:35 - 34:41] I don't know who the trust is.
[34:41 - 34:44] Not to break, but I'm so tired of this disease.
[34:44 - 34:50] Every time I try to make myself keep back up on my feet, all I ever think about is this.
[34:50 - 35:05] Or take everything from the inside and throw it all away.
[35:05 - 35:12] 'Cause I swear for the last time I will trust myself with you.
[35:12 - 35:20] The tension is building inside, stayin' away.
[35:20 - 35:26] Every last voice ain't that way out of me.
[35:26 - 35:29] Not to break, but I'm so tired of this disease.
[35:29 - 35:35] Every time I try to make myself keep back up on my feet, all I ever think about is this.
[35:35 - 35:41] All the time between and how tryin' to pull my trust in you just ain't so much out of me.
[35:41 - 35:50] Take everything from the inside and throw it all away.
[35:50 - 36:01] 'Cause I swear for the last time I will trust myself with you.
[36:01 - 36:10] I will raise myself on you.
[36:10 - 36:19] Raise myself on you.
[36:19 - 36:28] Take everything from the inside and throw it all away.
[36:28 - 36:36] 'Cause I swear for the last time I will trust myself with you.
[36:36 - 36:43] Raise everything from the inside and throw it all away.
[36:43 - 36:51] 'Cause I swear for the last time I will trust myself with you.
[36:51 - 36:59] YEAH! YEAH!
[36:59 - 37:28] YEAH!
[37:28 - 37:40] Put in the comments if you guys know what this song is.
[37:40 - 37:45] If you guys know the lyrics, I want you to type them out as I'm doin' them.
[37:45 - 37:51] I want Chester to be able to see every one of you guys showin' love for 'em right the fuck now.
[37:51 - 38:01] On my mark, 3, 2, 1, GO!
[38:01 - 38:06] Make sure you're thinkin' me back and you two famous and wrapped when you just turn around and start askin' me.
[38:06 - 38:11] If you want back from me, I'm sinkin' attention sick and hungry, sick and wrapped and I'll show you this.
[38:11 - 38:15] Find a place to feed your freak while I find a place to rest.
[38:15 - 38:22] I wanna be in another place I hate when you say you don't understand.
[38:22 - 38:29] I wanna be in the energy now with the enemy of this on my head.
[38:29 - 38:33] It means a little bit just like you and step on people like you to a runaway.
[38:33 - 38:35] I'm gonna do what I thought I knew.
[38:35 - 38:39] I remember back then you weren't used to be calm, used to be strong, used to be generous.
[38:39 - 38:43] But you just know that you'd watch what we now see, how quiet it is all along.
[38:43 - 38:47] I'm so sick of the tension, sick of the hunger, sick of you actin' like I owe you this.
[38:47 - 38:50] Find another place to feed your freak while I'm findin' a place to rest.
[38:50 - 38:56] I'm so sick of the tension, sick of the hunger, sick of you actin' like I owe you this.
[38:56 - 38:59] Find a place to feed your freak while I'm findin' a place to rest.
[38:59 - 39:06] I wanna be in another place I hate when you say you don't understand.
[39:06 - 39:13] I wanna be in the energy now with the enemy of this on my head.
[39:13 - 39:24] You try to take the best of me, go away.
[39:24 - 39:27] You never get the best of me, go away.
[39:27 - 39:44] You try to take the best of me, go away.
[39:44 - 39:49] Then when you say you don't understand.
[39:49 - 39:59] I wanna be in the energy now with the enemy of this on my head.
[39:59 - 40:18] Turn your back.
[40:18 - 40:47] Stay away from me.
[40:47 - 40:58] Now if you guys don't know, this one's a rarity.
[40:58 - 41:27] This is off their 20th anniversary.
[41:27 - 42:12] You try to take the best of me, go away.
[42:12 - 43:33] This morning I'm coming to love the enemy of this on my head.
[43:33 - 43:36] The ultimate RB show national tour is heading to you.
[43:36 - 43:38] Join us for special RB show pricing.
[43:38 - 44:07] The largest selection of factory fresh RB and up to 70%.
[44:07 - 44:12] Sometimes I need to remember just to breathe.
[44:12 - 44:17] Sometimes I need you to stay away from me.
[44:17 - 44:23] Sometimes I'm noticeably fine to know.
[44:23 - 44:27] Somehow I need you to go.
[44:27 - 44:38] Don't stay, forget all memories, forget all possibilities, take what you're changing me into.
[44:38 - 44:48] Don't stay, memories, forget all possibilities, take all your faithlessness with you.
[44:48 - 44:55] Don't stay.
[44:55 - 45:00] Sometimes I feel like I trusted you too well.
[45:00 - 45:05] Sometimes I just feel like screaming at myself.
[45:05 - 45:11] Sometimes I'm in disbelief, I didn't know.
[45:11 - 45:17] Somehow I need to be alone.
[45:17 - 45:27] Don't stay, forget all memories, forget all possibilities, what you're changing me into.
[45:27 - 45:38] Don't stay, memories, forget all possibilities, take all your faithlessness with you.
[45:38 - 45:48] Don't stay.
[45:48 - 46:12] I don't need you anymore, don't want to be alone and only one more day of you wasting me away.
[46:12 - 46:24] The knowledge is don't stay, forget all possibilities, what you're changing me into.
[46:24 - 46:35] Don't stay, forget all possibilities, take all your faithlessness with you.
[46:35 - 47:11] Don't stay.
[47:11 - 47:23] For anyone who's a fan right now of Lincoln Park and Ochester, I want you guys to put your favorite fucking song by him in the comments.
[47:23 - 47:51] The way the bass make, I never know.
[47:51 - 47:57] Just why you ride so far away, far away from me.
[47:57 - 48:07] I never know just why you ride so far away, far away from me.
[48:07 - 48:24] I never know just why you ride so far away from me.
[48:24 - 48:52] You can only fool yourself for so long, you can only fool yourself for so long.
[48:52 - 48:56] You guys know what to do these guys.
[48:56 - 49:21] Get this fool out of here.
[49:21 - 49:54] I never know just why you ride so far away, far away from me.
[49:54 - 50:23] I never know just why you ride so far away from me.
[50:23 - 52:37] I never know just why you ride so far away, far away from me.
[52:37 - 52:39] I never know just why you ride so far away from me.
[52:39 - 52:56] I never know just why you ride so far away, far away from me.
[52:56 - 57:48] I never know just why you ride so far away from me.
[57:48 - 58:18] don't want to be let down the same old road. Don't know the years down the train. Love was not enough when you want everything. Love that came to you and now the end must start.
[58:18 - 58:26] Oh, I shouldn't have listened to my heart
[58:26 - 58:30] Cuz I don't wanna be in that town
[58:30 - 58:33] I don't wanna live that life again
[58:33 - 58:39] Don't wanna be in that town the same old road
[58:39 - 58:43] Cuz I don't wanna be in that town
[58:43 - 58:46] I don't wanna live my life again
[58:46 - 59:30] Don't wanna be in that town the same old road
[59:30 - 59:34] Cuz I don't wanna be in that town
[59:34 - 59:37] I don't wanna live my life again
[59:37 - 61:51] Don't wanna be in that town the same old road
[61:51 - 61:58] C'mon
[61:58 - 62:08] Wasting away the self-inflicted soon decay
[62:08 - 62:15] What should have been whenever was the candy in for both of us
[62:15 - 62:22] Heavy as the hand that puts a finger, finger Heavy as the heart that fills a leg, rag
[62:22 - 62:26] Laying them all to waste
[62:26 - 62:36] Years you decided to erase and cross off with this
[62:36 - 62:41] So black out alive behind the noise
[62:41 - 62:49] You're staring at the sun and hope the light will finally guide you right from seeing
[62:49 - 63:08] Cross off the days gone by
[63:08 - 63:16] Calling you free
[63:16 - 63:21] The phantom leaf that was part of me
[63:21 - 63:25] You have lived, you have lost
[63:25 - 63:28] The separations were the gums
[63:28 - 63:31] Heavy as the hearts that go unspoken
[63:31 - 63:34] Heavy in the palms is now broken
[63:34 - 63:35] Broken
[63:35 - 63:38] Laying them all to taste
[63:38 - 63:44] Of that distraction in your wake
[63:44 - 63:48] Those are for days
[63:48 - 63:53] So black out alive behind the noise
[63:53 - 64:01] You're staring at the sun and hope the light will finally guide you right from seeing
[64:01 - 64:33] Cross off the days gone by
[64:33 - 64:46] Laying them all to taste
[64:46 - 64:57] Heavy as the hearts that go unspoken
[64:57 - 65:03] You're living everything you ain't to waste
[65:03 - 65:07] And cross off the days
[65:07 - 65:13] So black out alive behind the noise
[65:13 - 65:21] You're staring at the sun and hope the light will finally guide you right from seeing
[65:21 - 66:21] Cross off the days gone by
[66:21 - 66:24] And this final song
[66:24 - 66:27] Is going out to anyone that's ever felt alone
[66:27 - 66:33] That's walked that lonely road to despair, depression
[66:33 - 66:40] And is looking for a reason to stay alive and to keep fighting
[66:40 - 66:50] This is my reason
[66:50 - 66:58] And you guys are stuck around for this one
[66:58 - 67:04] You guys are fucking amazing
[67:04 - 67:06] And I'm not doing this for me
[67:06 - 67:08] I'm doing this for him
[67:08 - 67:10] For Chester
[67:10 - 67:12] Self fuck monetization
[67:12 - 67:14] I'm keeping his memory alive
[67:14 - 67:17] I'm living like this shelter
[67:17 - 67:20] I'm constantly alone
[67:20 - 67:23] I'm pointing out my weakness
[67:23 - 67:26] There's an emptiness at home
[67:26 - 67:32] I need to find a reason to live this way
[67:32 - 67:35] I'm running out of patience
[67:35 - 67:38] And my life is over
[67:38 - 67:44] I'm standing here but I'm on my way
[67:44 - 67:50] Searching to find an answer
[67:50 - 67:56] I'm standing here but it's all the same
[67:56 - 68:01] And I'm running out of patience
[68:01 - 68:22] And I will take my reason from you
[68:22 - 68:33] You love me, you love me, you're right, I'm all alone
[68:33 - 68:36] Well, before I continue this song
[68:36 - 68:41] I want to speak on something really quick that Schmeichel said
[68:41 - 68:45] Chester wasn't a pussy
[68:45 - 68:54] He suffered from a very serious, a very, very common illness
[68:54 - 68:56] He suffered from a lot of shit
[68:56 - 69:03] Everything from depression
[69:03 - 69:07] To even thinking about suicide
[69:07 - 69:10] And ultimately he took his life
[69:10 - 69:17] Chester was not a coward or a pussy
[69:17 - 69:19] He really wasn't
[69:19 - 69:22] He dealt with something that's very hard to get out of
[69:22 - 69:25] Unless you get the right help
[69:25 - 69:28] I myself am that same way
[69:28 - 69:33] I myself suffer from depression every day
[69:33 - 69:36] Because of people like you, Schmeichelcat
[69:36 - 69:39] Because of people like you and music biz Marty
[69:39 - 69:42] I suffer from depression on a daily basis
[69:42 - 69:47] People that judge me, people that attack me over and over and over
[69:47 - 69:54] And everyone wonders why I put on a fake smile
[69:54 - 69:58] That smile is a fake smile
[69:58 - 70:01] Because deep down I'm hurt
[70:01 - 70:05] I'm depressed, I'm sad, I'm angry, I'm pissed off
[70:05 - 70:12] And people like you, Schmeichel, people like you that attack, people like me for no reason
[70:12 - 70:21] People like you are the reason why people like Chester take their lives every day
[70:21 - 70:29] As people like you that cause me to almost take my own life twice within 48 hours
[70:29 - 70:35] Just a mere few weeks ago
[70:35 - 70:39] And thankfully I had an amazing support system
[70:39 - 70:45] I have some of the most amazing friends in the world that saved my life
[70:45 - 70:49] They showed me that suicide isn't the answer
[70:49 - 70:55] They pulled me back from that darkness that I thought I was going to go back down into
[70:55 - 71:04] And to my friends Brittany, Ted aka Grim the Rap Reaper and DeMarco
[71:04 - 71:08] I want to say thank you because you guys saved my life
[71:08 - 71:12] And if it wasn't for you I wouldn't be here today
[71:12 - 71:17] If it was not for any of you guys I wouldn't be here today
[71:17 - 71:21] So thank you
[71:21 - 71:27] So being on the edge of suicide is not being a pussy
[71:27 - 71:35] Sometimes you feel like it's the best thing for everyone around you
[71:35 - 71:40] And trust me when I say, depression does lead to suicide
[71:40 - 71:43] And depression is not an easy thing to deal with
[71:43 - 71:52] I live with it on a daily basis, every day I wake up and I live with it
[71:52 - 71:58] So taking your own life isn't being a pussy or a coward
[71:58 - 72:02] It's something that can't be helped
[72:02 - 72:07] So Schmeichelcat, you can take your comment and shove it up your fucking ass
[72:07 - 72:13] And go the fuck somewhere else kid
[72:13 - 73:08] [Silence]
[73:08 - 73:14] I'm standing here but on my way
[73:14 - 73:19] Searching to find an answer
[73:19 - 73:25] I'm standing here but it's all the same
[73:25 - 73:31] And I'm running out of patience
[73:31 - 73:42] And I will take my reason from you
[73:42 - 73:52] And I have gained my reason from you
[73:52 - 74:00] You left me, you left me here and I'm all alone
[74:00 - 74:21] I'm all alone
[74:21 - 74:32] [Silence]
[74:32 - 74:48] I'm all alone
[74:48 - 74:49] When is the change to find the reason to find the reason to find my reason to find my reason
[74:49 - 74:50] I need you and I need you
[74:50 - 74:54] And I want you but I need to get away from you
[74:54 - 75:13] And I need you and I want you but I need to get away from you
[75:13 - 75:21] Well take my reason from you
[75:21 - 75:27] And I need you and someone to love me
[75:27 - 75:29] But you do just love me
[75:29 - 75:32] And I love, I love me
[75:32 - 75:38] And I know you need you and someone to love me
[75:38 - 75:43] But I'm all alone
[75:43 - 76:06] To all of you that came out to see this show
[76:06 - 76:10] To all of you that came over here to see this show
[76:10 - 76:13] To honor Chester
[76:13 - 76:20] You guys are fucking amazing
[76:20 - 76:22] You know, I did this show
[76:22 - 76:26] Not to gain notoriety
[76:26 - 76:28] Not to gain fame
[76:28 - 76:30] Not to show off my talent
[76:30 - 76:31] For music
[76:31 - 76:34] Not to do any of that
[76:34 - 76:37] It wasn't to gain subscribers, it was none of that
[76:37 - 76:44] For me personally, it was to keep one of the greatest artists of all time
[76:44 - 76:49] Memory alive
[76:49 - 76:52] I did it to keep Chester's memory alive
[76:52 - 76:58] And to keep his music alive through all of us
[76:58 - 77:03] Because just like myself, I know his music has helped a lot of you over the years
[77:03 - 77:06] Just like it has with myself
[77:06 - 77:10] And I know to a lot of you, even though he was a famous music artist
[77:10 - 77:13] I know to a lot of you, he was more than that
[77:13 - 77:19] He was a hero, a friend, and a family member
[77:19 - 77:23] Even those of us that didn't know him considered him family
[77:23 - 77:29] And that will never, ever change
[77:29 - 77:39] Because when the world lost Chester, when we lost Chester
[77:39 - 77:43] We lost more than just one of the greatest music artists of all time
[77:43 - 77:51] And one of the greatest singers, period, in the history of music
[77:51 - 78:03] But we also lost a hero, a friend, a brother, and a major part of our community
[78:03 - 78:15] Chester and his band, Lincoln Park, they didn't just build a community or a fan base
[78:15 - 78:23] They built more than that, they built a family of fans all over the world
[78:23 - 78:27] At the end of the day, we're more than just fans
[78:27 - 78:33] At the end of the day, we're more than just normal people that listen to his band's music
[78:33 - 78:38] At the end of the day, we are more than just a Lincoln Park fan club
[78:38 - 78:41] At the end of the day, we are a Lincoln Park army
[78:41 - 78:44] We are an LPU family
[78:44 - 78:48] And that will never, ever change
[78:48 - 78:56] So if you see another fan out there that's going through the same shit that you're going through
[78:56 - 78:59] Or that I'm going through, or that Chester went through
[78:59 - 79:01] Or that anybody that you know of is going through
[79:01 - 79:06] I want you to reach out your hand and I want you to help them
[79:06 - 79:12] Even if they say they don't want it, stand by them and help them
[79:12 - 79:14] Because you never know
[79:14 - 79:19] Just by you doing that, you could be the deciding factor
[79:19 - 79:25] Of whether that person takes their life or you've saved their life
[79:25 - 79:34] Just like my friends, Brittany DeMarco and Ted saved my life
[79:34 - 79:42] Just like my three best friends in the world saved my life just a mere few weeks ago
[79:42 - 79:45] Now it's your guys' turn to pay it forward
[79:45 - 79:47] Just like I've done for some of you
[79:47 - 79:51] I know that some of you have messaged me saying that my music has helped you
[79:51 - 79:57] And that to me
[79:57 - 80:04] You guys saying that to me means more to me than some platinum record that I might get
[80:04 - 80:11] That means more to me than some plaque that I'm going to be getting a march for my record sales
[80:11 - 80:14] That means more to me than anything
[80:14 - 80:20] Because that shows me that I'm doing something right
[80:20 - 80:28] Not just for the music industry, but for humanity and for humankind as a whole
[80:28 - 80:31] Because let me tell you something right now
[80:31 - 80:36] Whether I help a thousand fans or one fan, I don't care
[80:36 - 80:43] At the end of the day, as long as I can help even one person through whatever they're going through
[80:43 - 80:46] I know I'm doing my job
[80:46 - 80:57] Because I'd rather have a small handful of real legit loyal fans than a thousand fake ones that don't give a shit
[80:57 - 81:03] I would rather help one person through my music that really needs to help
[81:03 - 81:10] Than to sign a million fucking autographs of fans that don't give a shit
[81:10 - 81:14] Because at the end of the day, you guys are the reason why I'm here
[81:14 - 81:17] You guys are the reason that I do my music
[81:17 - 81:23] Just like Chester was for us
[81:23 - 81:26] We were his reason for doing music
[81:26 - 81:35] We were the reason why he was here
[81:35 - 81:38] He did that to help people
[81:38 - 81:45] He made his music to help others like myself and like all of you
[81:45 - 81:53] His music and his memory and his legacy will never ever fucking die
[81:53 - 81:59] As long as we keep spreading his music and his message and keep helping others like ourselves
[81:59 - 82:01] His memory will never die
[82:01 - 82:08] His music will live on forever in all of us because at the end of the day, like I said
[82:08 - 82:11] We're more than just a Lincoln Park army
[82:11 - 82:14] We're more than just fans of Lincoln Park
[82:14 - 82:19] At the end of the day, we're a community, a family
[82:19 - 82:22] And that is facts
[82:22 - 82:30] And that will never, in a million years, ever change
[82:30 - 82:38] So like I said, if you see somebody going through a very hard time
[82:38 - 82:41] I don't care if you know them or not
[82:41 - 82:48] I want you to reach out to your hand and you fucking help them
[82:48 - 82:53] Because we all need help
[82:53 - 83:01] And it's not a cowardice move to ask for help
[83:01 - 83:05] Sometimes it may be hard to ask for help, yes
[83:05 - 83:09] But asking for help doesn't make you a coward
[83:09 - 83:12] And it sure as hell doesn't make you a pussy
[83:12 - 83:18] If anything, it makes you stronger
[83:18 - 83:23] It makes you way stronger
[83:23 - 83:28] So like I said, you see somebody going through some real shit
[83:28 - 83:31] You see somebody that's down and out
[83:31 - 83:36] Somebody that's being bullied, being picked on, being attacked
[83:36 - 83:41] Being ridiculed, going through a hard time
[83:41 - 83:45] I want you to reach your hand out to them, whether you know them or not
[83:45 - 83:55] That is my challenge for you guys for 2021 and the rest of what's left of 2020
[83:55 - 84:03] That is my challenge to you guys for the remainder of this year and for all of next year
[84:03 - 84:07] If you see somebody that's hurting or that's going through something
[84:07 - 84:14] I don't care whether it's on Facebook, on Discord, in real life, outside of social media, I don't care
[84:14 - 84:22] If they're going through something, you stop whatever the fuck you're doing and you help them out
[84:22 - 84:27] I want you to reach your hand out to them
[84:28 - 84:35] That is my challenge to you guys for the remainder of this year and for all of next year
Transcribed by lolcow.city as id '2202' on August 16th, 2024
