2019-10-6 Standing up for everyone the Bender Boyz have harassed and bullied - Lost Video (Audio Only)

[0:00 - 0:07] What's up guys? I know it's past 3am, but I wanted to come on here and do a series last stream.
[0:07 - 0:24] This message isn't just for the vendor boys, it's for anybody on YouTube that has bullied or messed somebody or even has been bullied by these people.
[0:28 - 0:35] For those of you that have been bullied and harassed by the vendor boys like I have, I want you to ask them that you're not alone.
[0:35 - 0:56] They've been doing this to me for a while now. Now to the vendor boys, I watched a few of your live streams and one thing I noticed that just sick of me is the fact that you guys go off and you bully these poor people for shits and giggles and fucking kicks.
[0:56 - 1:18] And it's honestly sickening. You know they're good honest people on here like myself who just want to be left alone to our own fucking channel and to make the content that we enjoy.
[1:20 - 1:38] Now when I was on the juggalo drama alert yesterday, one of your boys challenged me to come over to his house and throw down. I just wanted to know how to get his ass over here. And he said no, that I'm a cop caller and that's why he wouldn't do it.
[1:39 - 1:56] Now I will admit he is right that I am a cop caller, I'll admit. But there's something that somebody said that's very true. The only reason why I am a cop caller is because you guys pushed me to that point.
[2:02 - 2:19] You guys pushed me to the point where I have no choice but to call the police. You guys pushed me to that point. I didn't want to get to that point but you guys pushed me to it by doing the stuff you did.
[2:19 - 2:31] And you're constantly trying to make yourselves look better by saying that I called you out first and that's why you did what you did when you guys know that's not true.
[2:32 - 2:49] You guys know for a fucking fact that on the very first juggalo drama alert that I was on, you guys called me out by asking me how does it feel for me to take a mother from their children?
[2:50 - 3:14] You guys did this, not me. And when you guys did that, that's when I started fighting back. Now like I said in the last livestream, yes I am going to say something to Spanky and I do apologize for thinking that that guy was one of your guys.
[3:14 - 3:28] I apologize for that because he acted like one of you. And I'm sorry for that. But the one thing I'm not sorry for is standing up to you guys.
[3:28 - 3:49] So you guys run around and you act like you dominate people. It's some sort of game to you. To you it might be a game but to other people like myself it's not and it's not funny.
[3:54 - 4:18] I know that you put people like me through every fucking day. You don't think that what you said to me this entire time doesn't fuck with me on a huge level by talking about my dead family and me as a person by threatening to expose me?
[4:22 - 4:43] You don't think that doesn't hurt other people when you do what you do? See the only reason why I started fighting back and attacking you was because you guys started this when you accused me of being a murderer by asking how does it feel when I take a mother from her child?
[4:43 - 5:03] When not only did I but my good friend Karma and a lot of my friends explain to you guys that Candel took her own life. Candel took her own life by her own hands. Nobody forced her to do it.
[5:08 - 5:35] So granted me and her arguing might not have helped a lot, but that wasn't the only reason why she ended her life and you can sit there you can call me a coward and say what you will about me. I don't care because they're just words on a screen.
[5:35 - 5:58] But the others like myself, they're more than just words on a screen. See what you guys don't understand is that when you go around and you bully these people like you do, you don't know what they go through.
[5:58 - 6:25] I do because I have to see it every fucking day because of you guys. This guy right here is a prime example. He said in here bullying me, but what am I doing? I see it. I acknowledge it, but I'm ignoring it. I'm choosing to ignore his idiocy.
[6:25 - 6:47] And like I said, you know, me and her fighting might not have helped, but that was drove her to end her life. She was going through a lot and she actually had a lot of enemies.
[6:47 - 7:06] Like you can't ask any person level with help. You can ask her best friend, Allison Van Holen, who she had known since she was 16. Kendall had a lot of enemies, a lot of what she brought on herself.
[7:06 - 7:31] But another thing that did drive her to suicide was the fact that CSB threatened to take her kids from her on a constant basis. They hounded her and she was afraid that it was not right. She should not have killed herself.
[7:31 - 7:51] And believe me, even if there was some chance of me saving her life, I would have done it. I would have stopped her if I could have, but I had no clue she was going to end her life. None.
[7:51 - 8:10] You don't think I don't feel bad about what happened to her? I do. Yes, you know, me and her never got along really. I still actually, in a sense, gave a shit. I still cared.
[8:10 - 8:19] Because nobody deserves to take their fucking life. I've been on the edge of suicide many, many times.
[8:19 - 8:38] So I know what it's like to feel like you have nothing. I know what it's like to feel helpless alone. Like you're better off dead to the world. You feel like the whole world would be a better place without you.
[8:38 - 8:51] I know what that's like. And when you guys go around and you bully me and you bully these other people, that's exactly what they feel.
[8:51 - 9:11] You people drive these poor people to suicide. You guys bullying them and antagonizing them and attacking them relentlessly is what drives people like myself to suicide.
[9:11 - 9:32] Thankfully, I'm not in that position anymore. Because I found my mission in life, and my mission in life is to stop people like you from further hurting these poor kids and these poor people that you guys constantly attack.
[9:32 - 9:49] Because I know what it's like to be there. I've been there. Now you can call me weak. You can call me a coward. Call me whatever you want.
[9:49 - 10:04] You can continue to throw my information out there. You can continue to say you've dominated me whatever. I don't care. But I will not bow down to any of you guys or your wicked evil ways.
[10:04 - 10:28] The vendor boys are not good people. And one reason that I know that you're not good people is because you flat one of you guys flat out asked me to pay you 50 bucks to back you off.
[10:28 - 10:42] And I'm sorry, I'm not doing that. Even if I hadn't, I still wouldn't give it to you. See, that's the difference between me and everyone else.
[10:42 - 10:59] I have the courage to stand up to you guys. I don't care how many of you there are. There could be 100 of you. And I still would not give two shits. I would still stand up to every last fucking one of you no matter what.
[10:59 - 11:18] You can run your mouth. You can talk your shit. I don't care. You can the words you say about me, they don't affect me. Now I will admit you did strike a nerve when you brought my dead family into it.
[11:18 - 11:32] I'll admit that fucking hurt a lot. But at the same time, it showed just how weak you guys really are. How cowardly you are.
[11:32 - 11:46] By bringing someone's dead family into an incident, that shows that you're weak, and that you really are, that you really are a coward.
[11:46 - 12:12] And I'm sorry, but social media is no place for bullies and people like you guys that run around saying that you dominated this, that you dominated that, that, you know, you exposed this person, you exposed that person.
[12:12 - 12:32] Like there's no, I'm sorry, but you guys have no place on social media. It's honestly sickening to see just how fucked up and cruel you guys are to these people.
[12:32 - 12:41] How would you like it if you were in that person's shoes and they did that shit to you? How would you feel?
[12:41 - 12:58] How would you feel if you were in my position and somebody talk shit about your dead family that you cared about, about your best friend that got shot and murdered and cold blood?
[12:58 - 13:12] How would that make you feel? You cannot sit there and tell me that you would not be just as pissed off as I was.
[13:12 - 13:30] See, and you guys don't understand the hell that I deal with every fucking day, I have to live with the fact that Kendall's dead.
[13:30 - 13:43] I have to live with that and that hurts and it hurts even worse knowing that you guys actually think I did it.
[13:43 - 13:58] When I explained many times what happened over and over again, yes, I said that I was glad she was dead, but as I said, that was out of fear for my family.
[13:58 - 14:12] That was out of pure fear for my family because she threatened to murder me. She threatened to kill my family.
[14:12 - 14:29] And when I heard she was dead, that hurt a lot because I did still care as a person. I still cared about her.
[14:29 - 14:54] But when I got pushed to the edge by so many people calling me a murderer, by calling me a child killer, a baby killer, a mother killer, that sent me over the edge and that pissed me off so bad because I wanted it to stop.
[14:54 - 15:11] I wanted all of this to stop from the very get-go. But when I got pushed over that edge, my mind went back to thinking about when she threatened to kill me and my family.
[15:11 - 15:24] And that's why I said what I said because I was grateful that she cannot do harm to me or my family.
[15:24 - 15:41] Just like I'm glad that person that killed my brother back in 2016, I'm glad he's in jail. I'm glad he's rotting in a prison cell for the rest of his life.
[15:41 - 16:01] Nobody deserves to die, and nobody deserves to be bullied. Yes, can't do God bullied by a lot of people, but not one of those people were me.
[16:01 - 16:16] If anything, I tried to help her. I tried to stop the bullying. I tried to put a stop to it as much as I could.
[16:16 - 16:26] I actually tried to stop it, but my efforts did little to nothing to stop it.
[16:26 - 16:34] Did me and Kendall always see eye to eye? No, we fought more than anything.
[16:34 - 16:49] I'm looking back now, we probably fought because we were so late.
[16:49 - 16:58] But honestly, I am sorry that she's gone. I am sorry that she took her life.
[16:58 - 17:07] And I am sorry about saying that I was glad she was dead, but you have to understand why I said what I said.
[17:07 - 17:15] This girl threatened to put me in a body bag and threatened to kill my family.
[17:15 - 17:26] Do you know how scary that is? Just like last week, Jesse Alvera threatened to blow my mom's car up.
[17:26 - 17:41] Do you know how scary that was? If you guys go back and watch the last show, as soon as I saw that comment and I got a screenshot of it, I ran out of my room terrified.
[17:41 - 17:48] I was terrified because I didn't know whether that bomb threat was real or not.
[17:48 - 17:57] Just like when Kendall threatened my family's life, I didn't know if that was real or not.
[17:57 - 18:02] Am I sorry for saying that I was glad she was dead? Yes.
[18:02 - 18:14] But the one thing I'm not sorry for at all, nor will I ever apologize for, is standing up to you in the vendor booth.
[18:14 - 18:26] I'm not sorry for that. I'm not sorry for laying waste to use scumbags.
[18:26 - 18:37] I'm not sorry for standing up for people like myself who get bullied by people like you on a daily basis.
[18:37 - 18:44] You know, karma is right. You guys are cloud chasers. You're drama chasers.
[18:44 - 18:51] You're always looking for the next bit of drama. And for what reason?
[18:51 - 18:58] Why can't you just leave people to fuck alone and tend to your own channel?
[18:58 - 19:04] That's what I don't understand. Why do you have to mess with people like that?
[19:04 - 19:16] I never did understand that. What makes you want to fuck with somebody like that?
[19:16 - 19:23] Like, seriously, I don't get it. What's the point in bullying someone?
[19:23 - 19:30] Like, what's the goal? To push them so far that they commit suicide?
[19:30 - 19:34] Or do something stupid?
[19:34 - 19:48] And you guys wonder why these new generation of kids who get bullied, you wonder why they grow up to be killers and murderers.
[19:48 - 19:52] You wonder why they come out and they shoot up schools.
[19:52 - 19:55] It's not because there's something wrong with them.
[19:55 - 20:14] It's because the fact that you assholes bully them so fucking far to the point where they snap and they finally have had enough and they wind up coming after you.
[20:14 - 20:18] You think what you do to these people is fair, but it's not.
[20:18 - 20:26] It's not fair to me and it's not fair to anyone else.
[20:26 - 20:33] And to those that are getting bullied, I want to say I'm sorry and that you're not alone.
[20:33 - 20:48] I'm in the same boat as you. See, I created this channel not only in hopes to get my music career off the ground after 10 years of fighting really hard for it,
[20:48 - 21:09] but I also created this channel to create a community of like minded people and a safe haven where people come on here, have a good time and not have to worry about getting bullied or trolled by fucking assholes every five seconds of the day.
[21:09 - 21:38] That's my ultimate goal for this channel is to be able to get over 100,000 subscribers and to build a good solid community where people can come and feel safe and enjoy the content and have a good time and know that they can be on this channel and not have to get bullied or picked on.
[21:38 - 21:42] But with the bender bullets constantly on the loose and constantly attacking.
[21:42 - 21:48] How is that ever going to happen.
[21:48 - 21:53] See there's a spoken word poem that I wrote a while back.
[21:53 - 21:58] And it was actually in high school. It was actually my last year of high school that I wrote it.
[21:58 - 22:06] And one of the lines that I wrote is that the internet is nothing more than a mere child.
[22:06 - 22:09] There was no right and it knows no wrong.
[22:09 - 22:16] It only knows what we tell it to do.
[22:16 - 22:19] And that's the truth.
[22:19 - 22:27] Everybody says how the internet and the computers are evil, but really they're not.
[22:27 - 22:31] The internet and the computers are like children.
[22:31 - 22:41] They only do what we tell them to do, whether that thing is good or bad. That's up to us.
[22:41 - 22:44] We can't sit there and blame the internet.
[22:44 - 22:48] We only have ourselves to blame.
[22:48 - 22:53] Like I said, whether that thing is good or bad, it doesn't matter.
[22:53 - 22:59] We only have ourselves to blame.
[22:59 - 23:04] Some people have malicious and very bad intentions.
[23:04 - 23:11] And some of us like myself actually have good intentions.
[23:11 - 23:14] It's not the internet's fault.
[23:14 - 23:23] It's the people's fault, not the computers, and it sure as hell like the internet's fault.
[23:23 - 23:29] The internet doesn't control itself. We control the internet as a collective of people.
[23:29 - 23:33] We control what goes on.
[23:33 - 23:43] And honestly, if we can just set aside our differences and stop looking at how different we are
[23:43 - 23:51] and start looking at how alike we are, we can actually make a change and a very big one.
[23:51 - 23:56] We can actually start creating good communities for people.
[23:56 - 24:03] We can actually make the internet a better place.
[24:03 - 24:24] But how are we going to do that if we're constantly fighting each other and bullying everyone?
[24:24 - 24:32] You know, I thought everyone was created equally.
[24:32 - 24:39] Nobody should be better than anyone.
[24:39 - 24:54] But yeah, there's some of you like the Bender Boys and this Lord Zero and Skeletor of God.
[24:54 - 24:58] You guys think that you're better than everyone, but really, you're not.
[24:58 - 25:03] I believe the red. You believe red. We are all human.
[25:03 - 25:08] At the end of the day, we are all people. We are all human beings.
[25:08 - 25:12] And we deserve to be treated as such.
[25:12 - 25:22] Nobody deserves to be treated like shit, especially not by a bunch of fucking wannabe Juggalos.
[25:22 - 25:33] See, when I got brought into the Juggalo family by my best friend, Melissa, who unfortunately passed away several years ago,
[25:33 - 25:39] when I got brought into the Juggalo family, I was an outcast.
[25:39 - 25:46] I was the outcast of my school. I was the outcast and still am the outcast of society.
[25:46 - 25:51] But when I got brought into the Juggalo family, I found my home.
[25:51 - 26:03] I found a place where I can fit in and I can be myself. And no matter where I turn, I'd always have somebody there watching my back.
[26:03 - 26:12] What happened to those days? What happened to the days where Juggalos never fought each other, but we fought for the same cause?
[26:12 - 26:22] What happened to those days? What happened to us not being divided but being together? What happened to that?
[26:22 - 26:34] It's just like Twisted said, just because one person wears face paint and the other doesn't, it doesn't make the other person that wears face paint better than the one that doesn't.
[26:34 - 26:41] We are all equal at the end of the day. We are all still family at the end of the day.
[26:41 - 27:02] So what right do we have to judge each other? I don't get it.
[27:02 - 27:10] So to the bender boys, I say this. I'm not making you guys moderators at all.
[27:10 - 27:21] Now I am going to remove Spanky as a mod for what he said. That was messed up bringing one of your guys' old lady into it. That was not right.
[27:21 - 27:28] Now I'm not taking away from him permanently, but I will take it from him for a few days.
[27:28 - 27:38] I will do that. I plan on taking away from him for a few days.
[27:38 - 27:46] That I am going to do, but I am not going to sit here and make any of you boys mods.
[27:46 - 27:55] You see, nobody else may have had the balls to stand up to you, but I do.
[27:55 - 28:02] Matter of fact, Heather, I actually am going to make you a mod.
[28:02 - 28:09] I thought I did that already. My bad.
[28:09 - 28:15] All right, there you go. You are now a mod.
[28:15 - 28:28] But, you know, like I said to you bender boys that want to sit there on your mouth. See, nobody may have had the balls to stand up to you, but I do.
[28:28 - 28:34] And I don't care how many of you are like I said, I don't care how many of you there are.
[28:34 - 28:39] I will stand up to every last one of you, no matter what it takes.
[28:39 - 28:55] And so either a you guys get shut down and banned for good off of all social media or you guys start backing the fuck off and you start leaving me and everyone else alone and tell me your own fucking channel.
[28:55 - 29:06] See, that's why I'm getting so many views. That's why I'm getting out there and subscriber counts because I worry about my channel.
[29:06 - 29:14] I focus on what I do. I focus on my music. I focus on my videos.
[29:14 - 29:27] Meanwhile, what do you do? You run your mouth and you bully people and you talk shit about them and you try to expose them when they go against you.
[29:27 - 29:39] That right there is not the definition of a good person. That right there is the definition of a both way, which is what you are.
[29:39 - 29:52] And word zero, I already said the bender boys names several times over.
[29:52 - 29:59] See like Heather here, a.k.a. Carmel like her. I want this shit to stop.
[29:59 - 30:08] I want a peaceful but it's apparent to me that you guys are not going to stop.
[30:08 - 30:21] So I'm in for a war. I'm in this for the long haul and I'm not going to stop until you guys get shut down and stop for all the harm that you have caused so many people in their lives.
[30:21 - 30:27] And I know I'm not doing what I want. I've seen several of your guys's channels.
[30:27 - 30:38] I mean, I've done my research and what you guys have done to people is beyond fucked up and wrong.
[30:38 - 30:56] All right, Heather, be safe. And whenever you get on break or off, just give me a run and I'll hit you up.
[30:56 - 31:15] But, you know, you've been your boys. You just you need to stop what you're doing is fucked up on every goddamn level.
[31:15 - 31:31] You know, you say here to talk about how tough you are. If you were really that fucking tough and you were really a badass, you wouldn't need to show it.
[31:31 - 31:40] You wouldn't need to prove it. See, a real badass doesn't go around picking flights with other people.
[31:40 - 31:58] A real badass stands up for the week. He doesn't bully them. He doesn't attack them.
[31:58 - 32:09] And to be honest, a real badass doesn't bring somebody's family, especially dead family into their fights.
[32:09 - 32:18] What you guys are doing is wrong and it needs to fucking stop.
[32:18 - 32:24] There's a lot of people that fucking hate your guts right now and for good reason.
[32:24 - 32:33] Because you guys brought this shit on yourselves, not me, not anyone else. Yes, I called you out.
[32:33 - 32:38] I did call you out, but it was for a fucking reason.
[32:38 - 32:49] You guys attacked me during a fucking livestream. And before I got the chance to explain anything, you guys kept running your mouths,
[32:49 - 33:00] which is unfair to me. Maybe if you guys would shut your fucking mouths for five seconds and open your damn ears, maybe you would have heard me.
[33:00 - 33:15] And many of them things wouldn't have gotten to this point where I have to constantly defend myself, my friends, my family, and more and more I defend my channel.
[33:15 - 33:28] You think what you guys do is fair, but it's not. It's quite honestly fucked up.
[33:28 - 33:51] You really think what you guys are doing is a joke and that it's okay, but it's really not okay. Nobody is seeing it as a joke.
[33:51 - 34:04] And all of this cycle that was right when she said this stuff needs to stop and she's right. It does need to stop on both sides.
[34:04 - 34:14] But like I said, you can pay me all the money in the world that you want. But at the end of the day, I'm still not making any of you moms
[34:14 - 34:17] because you didn't earn it.
[34:17 - 34:27] See, everybody that I made a mod since day one on this channel has either been a mod for my previous channels or has earned it.
[34:27 - 34:36] And those mods that were on the other channels, they earned their spot. They earned their spot as mods.
[34:36 - 34:49] But you guys, however, I don't think there's any way that you guys will ever earn a spot as a mod unless you fucking stop bullying people.
[34:49 - 35:06] Now you might think that what I'm doing is a coward move by letting the comments be deleted, but no, that's not a coward move. That's me and more or less my mods and my fans and my friends.
[35:06 - 35:14] That's more or less them trying to keep the peace because they don't want negativity on this channel just like me.
[35:14 - 35:20] I hate negativity. I can't stand it.
[35:20 - 35:29] Which is why I give them permission to delete the fucked up comments you guys say.
[35:29 - 35:36] Because I don't want drama. I only want positivity and good shit on this channel.
[35:36 - 35:42] Now granted, the negativity does give me something to talk about. Yes.
[35:42 - 35:46] I'll admit that the negativity does give me something very real to talk about.
[35:46 - 35:57] And it actually gives me ideas for songs. I'll admit that because it allows me the negativity you guys feed to this channel.
[35:57 - 36:07] It allows me to take those negative things and turn them into good things like good songs to help people.
[36:07 - 36:11] And I'm thankful for that. Yeah.
[36:11 - 36:19] But when I'm not in the music artist's mindset, I try to avoid the negativity as much as I can.
[36:19 - 36:33] And I will continue to do so and I will continue to allow my mods to delete all your guys's negative comments.
[36:33 - 36:39] Because see, you guys might think that you're going right through, but the truth is you're not.
[36:39 - 36:43] I'm the one roadblock that you're not going to be able to go through.
[36:43 - 36:49] I'm the one person that you will not break through because unlike you, I'm made of fucking steel.
[36:49 - 36:53] And there ain't no getting through me.
[36:53 - 37:06] I will stand up for every last fucking person that you bully until the day that I fucking die.
[37:06 - 37:17] See, to kids like myself that I went to high school with, believe it or not, I hung out with the weird kids.
[37:17 - 37:24] I hung out with the kids that had special needs that had problems that were getting bullied.
[37:24 - 37:29] I was that weird kid that hung out with kids like that. And let me tell you something.
[37:29 - 37:40] Whenever somebody mess with them, besides my best friends who were actually in bands and musicians besides them,
[37:40 - 37:47] I was one of the very few who actually had the balls to stand up to the fucking people that were messing with them.
[37:47 - 37:58] So to them, we were like heroes to those kids because everybody ridiculed them and bashed on them.
[37:58 - 38:03] And we knew what it was like.
[38:03 - 38:09] And honestly, you guys are no better than those fucking high school boys that pick on those poor kids.
[38:09 - 38:14] You're no better than they are. If anything, you're worse.
[38:14 - 38:23] You're way worse because you sit there and you pick on these poor people like myself that don't deserve it.
[38:23 - 38:29] And then you try to justify by saying that it's payback.
[38:29 - 38:34] But the truth is there is no justifying what you do.
[38:34 - 38:44] Plain and simple. What you guys are doing is wrong. It needs to stop.
[38:44 - 38:51] But I just want to say that if you are somebody that is getting bullied and you're currently watching this
[38:51 - 38:56] and you're on the channel right now, just know that you're not alone.
[38:56 - 39:08] And please, by all means, feel free to hit that subscribe button and notification bell and the like button on this if you guys do enjoy this.
[39:08 - 39:16] You know, because I want to build this community into a positive place.
[39:16 - 39:22] And I know together that we can do it, you know, whether it be through gameplay, as a matter of fact,
[39:22 - 39:27] I am going to start doing some gameplay videos here and there.
[39:27 - 39:31] I do plan on doing that.
[39:31 - 39:37] Like once in a while, I'll do like a gameplay video of the day like on Monday or whatever.
[39:37 - 39:43] But I am also going to be focusing on my music as well.
[39:43 - 39:53] As soon as my sister, Angel, gets her paycheck, she's actually sending me 20 bucks to get my music up and going,
[39:53 - 40:00] which I'm going to be putting towards the Music Programs Foundation for me to make more music.
[40:00 - 40:04] I'm going to be putting it towards promo, all that stuff.
[40:04 - 40:10] So that's all I'm waiting on right there is to get my music out there is that 20 bucks.
[40:10 - 40:16] That's all I'm waiting on.
[40:16 - 40:24] But, you know, the vendor boys, honestly, you guys are nothing but pieces of shit.
[40:24 - 40:32] You guys are scum.
[40:32 - 40:39] And honestly, it's sickens me seeing what you guys do.
[40:39 - 40:45] You know, a cycle that might defend you. And that's fine. I understand why she does.
[40:45 - 40:51] I get it.
[40:51 - 40:56] I totally understand.
[40:56 - 41:04] But when you sit there and you do the things you do, that doesn't deserve defending.
[41:04 - 41:13] When you attack somebody, that does not deserve defending.
[41:13 - 41:19] If anything, I'll be straight up honest with you with the way you treated me and those people.
[41:19 - 41:22] You know what that deserves.
[41:22 - 41:28] If you were here and you did that shit, I'll be straight up honest with you.
[41:28 - 41:35] To be honest, those are grounds for an asshole.
[41:35 - 41:41] Like when you attack somebody like that and you bully them so bad to the point where they want to end their life.
[41:41 - 41:45] Those are grounds for fucking beating.
[41:45 - 41:50] Those are grounds for getting your fucking ass kicked.
[41:50 - 42:00] Now see, behind the computer, you guys might act like badasses, but everybody knows when you're not behind the keyboard and on a screen.
[42:00 - 42:05] You know, we all know that you're not badasses.
[42:05 - 42:10] Like, so stop acting like it.
[42:10 - 42:17] Yeah, I may be small for my age. I may only be five foot three, yeah.
[42:17 - 42:21] And you guys can kick me around and beat me all you want, I don't care.
[42:21 - 42:25] But let me tell you this.
[42:25 - 42:35] I will continue to get back up and fight every last one of you until I am dead.
[42:35 - 42:40] You can beat me down, you can punch me, you can kick me.
[42:40 - 42:45] You can beat me till I'm fucking bloody in half day.
[42:45 - 42:53] But the truth is, I'll still get back up each and every fucking time.
[42:53 - 42:55] Why?
[42:55 - 43:00] Because unlike you guys, I have heart.
[43:00 - 43:05] And I know what it's like to be in a very real fight.
[43:05 - 43:15] Not only do I fight for my life every day, but I try to make my life an example for others like myself.
[43:15 - 43:22] I try to inspire others. I try to help people. That's what I do.
[43:22 - 43:29] And if you can't handle that, then what are you even doing on this channel?
[43:29 - 43:37] I have no room for negativity on this channel. I have no room for bullshit on this channel.
[43:37 - 43:44] The only thing I have room for is positivity and support.
[43:44 - 43:50] That's the only thing I have any time for.
[43:50 - 43:56] And if you can't handle that, then I'm sorry, I don't know what to tell you.
[43:56 - 44:10] But know this, the bender boys have started a war that me and my families and my mods are going to win.
[44:10 - 44:15] See, you may have started this a little battle and you might think you're winning the battle.
[44:15 - 44:18] You can win as many battles as you want.
[44:18 - 44:26] But at the end of the day, it's me and my friends and my mods and my fans and those that care about what I do.
[44:26 - 44:33] We're the ones winning the battle at the end of the day. We're the ones that are taking this war.
[44:33 - 44:41] And boy, when I say I don't want a war, but if I have to fight against you guys, I'll fight against you.
[44:41 - 44:53] I have no problem with that. I have no problem defending the week. I have no problem standing up to you guys.
[44:53 - 44:56] And I already know what you guys are going to say.
[44:56 - 45:05] Is it, you know, if I ever leave a live stream that that makes me a coward and that you dominate and this and that.
[45:05 - 45:10] But that's not true.
[45:10 - 45:19] Like I said the other day when I left after you guys fucked me really bad, I was not mad.
[45:19 - 45:29] I was not as mad as you guys thought I left so I can cool down before I say something I regret.
[45:29 - 45:35] I left to get my head right so I don't say something stupid.
[45:35 - 45:47] To either a get myself killed or be get myself arrested or to have my channel take them down.
[45:47 - 45:53] See, unlike you guys, I use my fucking head.
[45:53 - 46:09] But you guys, you go off with what someone says and that's not cool, nor is that smart.
[46:09 - 46:19] But to anybody out there that is being bullied, I want you to know that you're not alone and that you have friends within this community that will help you.
[46:19 - 46:29] That will stand up for you. And I know I got a lot of fake fans up in here that say oh you saved my life you did this you did that oh take your shirt off.
[46:29 - 46:37] No, I see right through the fake fans which is why I ignore the fake ones.
[46:37 - 46:47] Now if I did actually save your life and you're an older fan or you're a newer one. I'm glad about that.
[46:47 - 46:53] I'm glad I was able to help you I'm glad I was able to save your life, and I'm proud of that.
[46:53 - 46:59] I'm proud that you didn't take your life.
[46:59 - 47:04] But here's the thing though I know a fake fan when I see one.
[47:04 - 47:12] I dealt with so many fake fans around my music career over the last 10 years when I first started.
[47:12 - 47:17] You know, I know what to look for.
[47:17 - 47:21] And believe me when I say I see right through the fakes.
[47:21 - 47:30] I know who's real and who's not.
[47:30 - 47:39] I know so I do want to say this to whoever got Jesse Alvera put in jail for all those bomb threats.
[47:39 - 47:42] Thank you so much.
[47:42 - 47:50] Like I owe you my life, how my family owes you their lives.
[47:50 - 47:57] Because you Jesse cannot follow through with his bomb threats, and I'm glad about that.
[47:57 - 48:08] I'm happy about that.
[48:08 - 48:12] Now there is a short film that did called alone.
[48:12 - 48:20] It actually touches on suicide and how bullying relates to suicide.
[48:20 - 48:36] In the film I actually did use clips of me being bullied, whether they were screenshots or video clips I did use some of that in the film to kind of show how bad things can get.
[48:36 - 48:43] So you guys would like a very realistic movie, you know, by all means go check it out.
[48:43 - 48:55] I do plan on posting my film with as well which you guys don't know darkness is actually a Halloween based movie it's a scary movie for Halloween that did last year.
[48:55 - 49:00] Oh it's another one of my solo films where it was just me and the camera.
[49:00 - 49:07] It still turned out to be a really good movie though all the same like it was pretty interesting.
[49:07 - 49:13] So you guys do like horror movies definitely check that out.
[49:13 - 49:21] Also on a side note I will be teeming with Operation smile which is a charity that I'm actually a volunteer for.
[49:21 - 49:31] I actually will be teaming together with them to put together a film to help them out on the films actually give me a documentary of different kids.
[49:31 - 49:39] Not only have I had the opportunity to meet and help over the years, but several others as well.
[49:39 - 49:44] The movie, the documentary is called through the eyes of a child.
[49:44 - 49:50] So that's going up I'm not sure when that's going to happen but I'm very excited for that.
[49:50 - 50:04] Like I am beyond excited for that film because I love Operation smile as a matter of fact, I'm a good friend of our family who a lot of you guys might know, who is actually a big time actor.
[50:04 - 50:14] Both Bo and Jeff Bridges, the Bridges brothers are actually the cousins of my brother's best friend Kevin.
[50:14 - 50:27] And they're the ones that got turned on to the film called smile, which is about this girl from China who has left live and her family can't afford the surgery.
[50:27 - 50:36] Kate finds out about it, but in the movie it's called doctors gift offers smiles actually known as doctors gift in the movie.
[50:36 - 50:49] Basically she finds out about it goes over there and then she finds this girl that has the club and finds out that they're the same age, and I it's a really good movie.
[50:49 - 51:01] But that film is how I got turned on the operation smile and I've been doing it since I was like 1415 years old I have a very good phone.
[51:01 - 51:12] Like, you know, I definitely, you know, a huge, you know, part of that, like I've done music videos for that I've done.
[51:12 - 51:25] There's different stuff promoting operation smile over the years and why I'm super excited to be involved in this because you know operation smile is a charity that's actually very close to me.
[51:25 - 51:40] And believe me when I say you know seeing those kids up close is way different than seeing them in a photo like when I saw my bird when I saw for the first time when I saw one of those kids.
[51:40 - 51:48] I broke down here and I felt so bad for the kid, because he was getting bullied by people who I went to high school with.
[51:48 - 51:51] Like these are the guys that bully me.
[51:51 - 51:58] And this poor kid was getting bullied and picked on by those assholes like that pissed me off.
[51:58 - 52:04] So bad.
[52:04 - 52:11] Like, you have no idea how pissed off that got me.
[52:11 - 52:18] You know and I had a little bit of money because I was with my church at the time when it happened.
[52:18 - 52:27] You know, one of our directors for that trip had given us money to get food but which I could have gotten food.
[52:27 - 52:30] I could have spent the money on some food.
[52:30 - 52:33] But instead of spending the money on food.
[52:33 - 52:39] That money went right to Operation Smile soon as I see they were there.
[52:39 - 52:47] As soon as I've seen Operation Smile there and I've seen that kid getting messed with. I walked right up and I haven't even got the money out of the platform I was like here.
[52:47 - 52:54] This is to help that poor kid to get that surgery that he needs.
[52:54 - 53:01] I've been an online volunteer for Operation Smile for like I said as long as I can remember.
[53:01 - 53:07] And I do actually still do keep in contact with that kid's family like the kid's family is super cool.
[53:07 - 53:17] He's actually graduating school next year or the year after.
[53:17 - 53:26] But the kid lives over in Indonesia or something but he's a super cool kid. He's very awesome. He's the coolest kid ever.
[53:26 - 53:38] But, you know, like I said, you know, like that's a charity that's very close to me and always has been.
[53:38 - 53:46] So Bo, Jeff, if you guys are fucking watching this and if you guys don't know, Bo and Jeff I've known since I was like 10.
[53:46 - 53:50] So, you know, they're kind of like my uncles in a sense.
[53:50 - 53:56] So Bo, Jeff, if you guys are watching this, I fucking love you guys. I miss you guys.
[53:56 - 54:00] We need to hang out. I ain't seen you guys since I was a fucking kid.
[54:00 - 54:09] Except for Google Hangouts Uncle Jeff. I remember that. I still got photos of that. That was awesome.
[54:09 - 54:13] Oh, that's awesome.
[54:13 - 54:26] I'm glad he's okay though. That's awesome. I'm glad to see that he's doing good.
[54:26 - 54:38] But, you know, as a matter of fact, I do actually have something I want to do for you guys.
[54:38 - 54:49] But this song I'm actually about to do is actually a song that if you guys listen to a lot of God Smack, you guys obviously know Saul Ierna.
[54:49 - 55:07] Saul Ierna from God Smack actually dedicated the song to the Operation Smile family. You guys will see why here in a minute.
[55:08 - 55:27] [sound of a microphone]
[55:27 - 55:37] For your health and your families, choose University Hospitals. With science and compassion, we provide expert care at every level.
[55:37 - 56:05] [music]
[56:05 - 56:15] I need to release them from the pain.
[56:15 - 56:26] They can't take the pain.
[56:26 - 56:42] I'm so wasted, waste away. As I reckon Jesus dies, I'm so lonely for you.
[56:42 - 57:00] Here the children cry. One by one they die. Can you help them? Look what we've done to our state.
[57:00 - 60:19] [singing]
[60:19 - 60:35] If you guys want to know the name of the song, it's called Through the Eyes of a Child by Saul Ierna, which ironically is the name of the documentary I'm going to be working with. I'm actually going to be editing it and uploading it. Don't know when.
[60:35 - 60:58] But we actually came up with the name before we even realized it was a song name.
[60:58 - 61:15] Now, speaking of music, I do actually want to introduce you guys to a band that I actually hadn't known since high school, which I still very close friends with all the fucking members.
[61:15 - 61:26] Let's see if I can find your eye. Here we go.
[61:26 - 61:29] This band is called Sandcat. This is actually their song version.
[61:29 - 65:36] [singing]
[65:36 - 65:50] Ah, here we go. Here's actually one of my affairs by the name called Shadow Girl. I absolutely love this song.
[65:50 - 69:55] [singing]
[69:55 - 70:01] Shut up, I'm not hearing anything from them. I'm going to watch Sandcat, man.
[70:01 - 70:09] Huge shout out to Sandcat, man. I don't know if they're getting any more music. I've not heard anything from them in a while.
[70:09 - 70:19] Their lead vocalist, Sandra, is one of my best friends. She's actually doing photography work now, which is ironic.
[70:19 - 70:41] [singing]
[70:41 - 70:47] Now, I do want to do some old school stuff for you guys.
[70:47 - 71:03] Definitely. It's always a good time. Always.
[71:03 - 71:09] Let's see. What one do I want to do?
[71:09 - 71:23] You know, I got something for you guys.
[71:23 - 73:25] [singing]